To Be A Father
by The Fluff Queen
Summary: When Rachel is pregnant with the enemy's baby, Puck steps up to care for them. Sometimes your father isn't the man who made you. A Puckleberry story.
1. Prologue

**Author's Note: **I don't even know where this story came from, but it stuck with me. Hope you like it. For this to work, consider that Rachel lost her virginity to Jesse after 'Bad Reputation', but everything else happened exactly like it did in canon.

**Disclaimer: **No. Unfortunately. You think I'd let Finchel stick after Puck or Jesse?

**Summary: **When Rachel is pregnant with the enemy's baby, Puck steps up to care for them. Sometimes your father isn't the man who made you.

**To Be a Father**

_**Prologue**_

**H**e's standing in front of the nursery's glass window, soaking in the last hours with the beautiful baby girl – Beth – he and Quinn made together, when he feels her presence by his side. A brief glance at her tear-streaked face makes him wrap an arm around her shoulders, and she hugs his waist. "She's beautiful, Noah", she whispers, and he smiles slightly, because Beth is actually a stunner despite being only some hours old. He rubs her back comfortingly and leads her to sit down on the nearest chair.

"How are you holding up, Rach?" She opens her mouth to speak and he looks at her sternly. "And don't even give me that 'I'm fine, Noah, really'", he mimics her and she smiles weakly. "That's crap. I know it, you know it, so please just tell me the truth".

She sighs shakily and runs her fingers in her hair, leaning forward and resting her forehead against his shoulder. Tears fall from her eyes and she grabs his hand, squeezing it tightly before slipping a plastic tube into his palm. Looking confused at her for a moment, he looks down at the object she passed him – and his heart stops, because he knows exactly what it is, and what it means.

It's a pregnancy test – a positive pregnancy test.

"It's not mine", he replies automatically, and she snorts between her tears before rolling her eyes.

"Of course it's not yours, Noah", she worries her lower lip, tears welling in her eyes as they lock with his, and his shocked expression softens into one of worry and sadness. He doesn't say a word, never breathes a letter, just wraps his arms around her and allows her to slide on his lap, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead as she fists the fabric of his shirt and cries against the curve of his neck. "What am I going to do, Noah?" She whispers desperately, and he squeezes her a little tighter.

"You're going to be okay, Rach. I promise you", he mumbles in response, humming softly in other to keep her calm. "Does he know yet?"

She shakes her head negatively. "No, he… He left as soon as he walked out of the stage, and he hasn't been picking my calls". She pauses for a moment then adds, "And I don't know if he'll be interested on being a part of our life. He's leaving to California anyways".

He sighs because he can't believe he's doing this, but… "He has rights, Rach", he says softly. "As the father, he has rights, and one of them is the right to know he'll have a child in less than eight months. Even if he chooses not to be a father, still it'll be his choice, not yours, because that's not even your choice to make". She is stiff and silent in his arms, and he sighs again. "Remember how Quinn forced Finn to be a father when he didn't want to be?"

Apparently, it turns out that's the wrong question to make, because she breaks down in tears again. He panics for a moment, before she begins to say in between sobs, "Finn… He… Oh Jesus… He said he loved me!" She whimpers in pain again, and Puck stares in absolute shock at her.

"He did what? When?" But she's hyperventilating, and it crashes on him that this has been an absolutely exhausting day for her – not only an exhausting day, but week, month. And, being pregnant, she needs to be taken care of. So, he rises, taking her in his arms bridal style. "C'mon, we're going home".

"Noah!" She squeals indignantly, clutching at his shoulders. "Put me down this instant! You have your daughter and Quinn to look after!" She demands, but he can see the tiredness and heartbreak hidden underneath the veil of her diva behavior, and he shrugs.

"Beth and Quinn have people to take over their care for tonight. You don't, Rach. At least not until you tell St. James he knocked you up. I can do it for tonight. Let's go".


	2. 1

**Author's Note: **I don't even know where this story came from, but it stuck with me. Hope you like it. For this to work, consider that Rachel lost her virginity to Jesse after 'Bad Reputation', but everything else happened exactly like it did in canon.

I have **no idea whatsoever **of who is going to be the romantic pairing. What I know that Puck will play a big role in Rachel's pregnancy. I'm leaning towards making this a St. Puckleberry triangle, because I love Puckleberry, and Jon and Lea together are too adorable.

**Disclaimer: **No. Unfortunately. You think I'd let Finchel stick after Puck or Jesse?

**Summary: **When Rachel is pregnant with the enemy's baby, Puck steps up to care for them. Sometimes your father isn't the man who made you.

**To Be a Father**

_**One**_

**S**he falls asleep the moment he puts her on the passenger seat of his truck. The drive to her house is made in silence – only the buzz of his car stereo set on the soft rock station tuned down to a low volume keeps him company as he drives them both back to the Berry residence. He's deeply in thought, considering Rachel's situation – if possible, hers is even worse than Quinn's, because he never stooped as low as St. Jerk did. He made a point of never putting his baby mama's health in risk.

His heart breaks because Berry, who is so full of life, of dreams and ambition, is now someone's baby mama. She's Jesse St. James' baby mama. _And she didn't deserve that_, he thinks bitterly, because it's not fair for Berry to be knocked up on her first time by a jerk like their former teammate. It wasn't fair for Quinn either to be knocked up by him, but at least…

Puck would die before hurting Quinn the way Jesse hurt Rachel. That shit was not kosher. But… He sighs exasperated, because, whether they like it or not, St. James has rights. He has the right to know Rachel is pregnant, to decide whether he wants or not to be a part of the baby's life (his loss if he doesn't).

They arrive at the Berry house, and it's dark and still. A quick glance at the driveway tells Puck that once again Louis and Eli Berry are out on a trip – business or pleasure, or both, he never knows – and he turns the engine off. With a sigh – because he knows he won't leave Rachel alone tonight – he circles the truck and opens her door, taking her on his arms. She fits against him perfectly, her cheek coming to rest against his shoulder, and he's surprised at how childlike she looks right now. A sleeping Rachel looks innocent, sweet, pure.

And his heart breaks because she's not innocent or pure. Not anymore. St. James did the one thing everyone in Lima has been trying to do ever since Rachel Berry grew old enough to be considered different, a freak.

He broke her.

Pressing a soft kiss to his forehead, he clicks the door close, the noise making her stir. "Noah?" She blinks sleepily, and he smiles at her.

"Yeah, it's me, babe. We're home. Your dads not in town?"

She snuggles against him again, shaking her head and yawning a bit. "Daddy had this weeklong business trip to Miami and dad tagged along. They left yesterday night". She yawns again. "I'm so tired, Noah", she mumbles, and he quickly crosses the path to the sidewalk to their front door.

"I know, Rach, but you have to shower first and then sleep, okay? Then tomorrow morning, we'll talk. You need to sort things out, with Schue, with St. James…"

She nods again, mumbles in agreement and hands him the spare key. He opens the door and kicks it closed, elbowing the nearest light switch on and bathing the small hall in a golden glow. She blinks and turns her face so that it's hidden against his chest, and he chuckles because she's still looking like a child, and acting like one too now. "I can walk, you know?" She mumbles against his shirt, and he rolls his eyes, because it was too good to be true.

"Rach, you really think you can walk up all the stairs to your room without falling in your ass?" He challenges, and she glances at the stairs with a small frown. She knows that, if she really wants to, she can do it. But she's so tired, and she's so comfortable in Noah's arms… He has his answer when she burrows back into his arms, and he bites back a smirk. "I'll just text mom while you're in the shower, you shouldn't be here alone", he says as he climbs up to her room.

She has to blink away tears, because he's being so sweet and considerate with her. "Thank you, Noah", she whispers as he puts her on the bed, and he shrugs her off.

"I'll just make that call to mom, 'kay? You take a shower and then go to bed", he walks out of the room closing the door behind him, and she quickly undresses before stepping under her warm shower. After a long and relaxing shower, she stops in front of her bathroom mirror and stares at her still flat stomach.

There's a life growing inside it. A baby, conceived by Jesse and her. Her hand comes to rest on her stomach, and she has to bite back tears, because this child is fruit of lies and deceit. _God, will I hate my child because of who is his or her father? _She questions herself silently, teetering on the brink of a full panic attack. She's having Jesse St. James' baby. She's expecting the child of a man who used her feelings, who broke her spirit, who lied and manipulated her and did what no one else had done before.

_But it wasn't always a lie. It couldn't be_, she thinks desperately, shaking violently as she turns her back to her reflection and rushes to get dressed. She can hear Noah's low rumble coming from the corridor, and she takes deep breaths to calm herself down. She settles down on her bed and picks her purse, rummaging through it until she finds her cell phone, which she pulls out. She hesitantly presses the first number on her speed dial, and bites her lower lip as she waits for the call to connect.

"Hello…"

"Jesse!"

"… You've reached Jesse St. James, bound to the little University of California Los Angeles – maybe you've heard of it, it's in Los Angeles. I'm unavailable right now, so please leave your name and number so I can call you back later". A loud beep sounds, and she chews on her lower lip before breathing deeply.

"Hey, Jesse, it's me. We… We need to talk. Please call me back".

**

* * *

A**nne Puckerman is sound asleep when her oldest son calls saying he won't be coming room because a friend need him right now. She groans because something tells her it's a _female _friend, and she tells him so. But then he hesitates and then says with a sigh, "It's Rachel, mom". She perks up immediately because it's been a while since Noah last mentioned Rachel. But, of course, she has to make sure.

"Rachel?"

"Yeah, mom. Rachel Berry". A pause, and then he adds, "Jewish Rachel".

She cheers silently and replies casually, "I didn't know you and Rachel were back together".

"Fuck, ma, it's not like that!"

"Language, Noah Puckerman!"

He growls and rubs a hand against his eyes. "Sorry, ma. But it's not like that. Rachel and I are friends, just that. So please stop planning our wedding and how many Jewish grandchildren you want, because that's not happening", he says sharply.

"I wasn't thinking anything", Anne says innocently. She tells her son to take care and call her in the morning, and she can tell by his distracted, "'Kay, mom. Love you", that he hasn't heard a thing. But that's okay because for the first time in months Noah is spending time with a girl worthy of him (That shiksa Quinn was very deliberately trying to sabotage her son with her bacon).

She goes to sleep with a smile on her face, and dreams of beautiful Jewish grandbabies with jet black hair and hazel green eyes.

**

* * *

H**e sighs when he finishes the call with his mom and knocks lightly at her door. The shower isn't running anymore so she's either asleep on her clothes or getting dressed, so he creaks the door open and looks at the opposite wall as he says, "Are you decent? I'm going in".

"I'm decent", she says, and she's lying on her back at her bed, her phone clutched at her hand. "I… I just called Jesse".

"Oh?" He takes his shoes and socks off and lies next to her, and she turns on her side. "And?"

"Left a voicemail. I doubt he'll call back, but…"

Puck snorts because, really? For someone so perceptive (she figured out the secret of Beth's paternity by herself, for crying out loud), Rachel is pretty blind. "He will. He loves you".

She stares at him disbelievingly. "Are you drunk, Noah?"

"No, but you're blind. He loves you, Rach. If he loves anything more than his hair, that's you. He'll call".

She yawns and snuggles against him, refusing to offer a reply, because, even though she believes Jesse won't call, she can't help but hope that Noah is right. "Good night, Noah", she says softly. "And thank you. For being here".

"Sweet dreams, Rach".


	3. 2

**Author's Note: **I don't even know where this story came from, but it stuck with me. Hope you like it. For this to work, consider that Rachel lost her virginity to Jesse after 'Bad Reputation', but everything else happened exactly like it did in canon.

I'll let you guys know that this chapter, with Jesse in all his St. Jerk-ness, was incredibly difficult to write, that's why the big St. Berry talk is so short and abrupt. Lots of Puckleberry fluff to make up, though!

To my reviewer _Kate_: Voilà! The story is now very much a Puckleberry. St. Berry has one of their one and it's called fatherhood.

**Disclaimer: **No. Unfortunately. You think I'd let Finchel stick after Puck or Jesse?

**Summary: **When Rachel is pregnant with the enemy's baby, Puck steps up to care for them. Sometimes your father isn't the man who made you.

**To Be a Father**

_**Two**_

**S**he wakes up the next morning and the smell of pancakes and waffles makes her stomach churn. Unable to hold any longer, she rushes to her bathroom and empties the contents of her stomach on her pristine toilet. She heaves and heaves until there's nothing left on her tummy, and she leans against the cool tiles of her wall, feeling weak and tired. She hears Noah calling, and she forces herself to stand up. She brushes her teeth, washes her face and then nearly drags her feet back to her room.

Noah takes a look at her and passes her a packet of crackers and a bottle of water. She looks at him funny, and he shrugs. "Quinn always said the crackers and the water kept her from fainting because of the morning sickness. Since you're early on your pregnancy, you still have two or three months of vomiting ahead of you", he says and settles in the bed next to her. "He called?"

Gulping down the juice and nibbling on the crackers, she shakes her head negatively. "I don't think so, he probably went partying last night with the other members of Vocal Adrenaline and I would have heard if he had called". She yawns and stretches and looks shyly at him. "Thank you, Noah. For everything. You have your own personal issues to deal with and yet here you are helping me out".

He shrugs her off and steals a cracker, munching on it distractedly. He's silent for a long minute before admitting quietly, "It helps. Focusing on someone else, I mean. It helps because it keeps my brain away from what Beth is doing right now, who should be caring for her instead of her new mother".

She nods in understanding, wrapping her arm around his broad shoulders and squeezing them once, softly. He gets up and says he needs to make a call for his mom, and she nods again, getting up to shower and get dressed. She takes her cell phone with her to the bathroom, because she wants to hear when Jesse calls.

And call he does, when she's halfway done with her shower. She has the shower off (to save water) when she hears 'Hello' coming from the tiny speakers, and she rushes out of the washing area, picking it up breathlessly. "He… Hello?" She stammers nervously.

"Rachel". Jesse's voice is cold and makes her shiver in panic. "You called me last night. What is it?"

"Jesse…" Her heart is clenching nervously inside her ribcage, and it leaves her mouth before she can carefully choose her words. "Jesse, I'm pregnant. We're having a child".

There's a long silence from the other side of the line, and she clutches desperately at her phone, shivering from cold and fear. Her heart is thumping loudly in her ribcage and she fights back a wave of nausea. Jesse's stunned silence is not exactly the reaction she was hoping from him. "Is that some kind of sick joke, Rachel?" He asks harshly, and she blinks in shock.

"I… I beg your pardon?"

"Is this some sort of revenge you came up with to get back at me for what I did on the parking lot? 'Hey, let's tell Jesse I'm pregnant so he can feel bad!' Guess what, sweetheart, it didn't work. Forget you ever met me. Believe me, that's what I'm doing. Goodbye, Rachel".

Then he cuts the call.

Rachel stands naked in the middle of her bathroom, stunned into silence, before breaking down in quiet tears. Jesse just did the unthinkable – he turned his back on her and their child, but why? It's not possible that he thinks it's not his baby, she was a virgin before they slept together and she hasn't been intimate with anyone since him.

She loses track of time, but Noah barges in the bathroom, panic stricken. "Rachel? What's wrong?" He kneels in front of her and puts his hands in her shoulders, and she falls into him, crying and hugging him tight, and he's lost for a moment before taking charge of the situation. He reaches out and picks a fluffy towel, wrapping it around her carefully that her naked body is covered from his view before he picks her up in his arms and carries her to her bedroom. He places her in her bed and rummages through her dresser before chucking at her a white summer dress and panties. He stays with his back turned at her as he hears her moving. Once he figures out she's dressed, he picks up her brush and sits down on the mattress behind her, proceeding to brush her hair carefully.

"Jesse called", she whispers quietly, and he freezes for a moment before returning to his task. "I told him about the baby". Her voice is thick with tears and she doesn't need to tell him the rest because he knows exactly what happened. St. Jerk went ahead and fucked it up. That son of a bitch.

He puts the brush aside and wraps his arms around her, and she cuddles against him, her body turned to the side so she's pressed against him, her face resting against his shoulder. "Oh, Noah, what am I going to do?" She whispers brokenly, and he rubs her back affectionately, comfortingly. They stay silent for a long time, and she's so emotionally exhausted that she falls asleep in minutes.

He puts her back on the bed and picks up his truck keys and cell phone, marching determinedly out of the bedroom. While crossing the way to his truck, he calls Santana. "Satan", he says before she can bitch at him, "I need you to come to Berry's house and keep an eye on her while I take care of some shit. I won't take long, I guess. And, San?' He's silent for a long time, thinking carefully. "Berry is in some fucked up situation. Please, be human for once in your life and stop treating her like shit".

Santana is silent for a minute and then asks him quietly, "Puck, what's going on?"

He knows he can trust her – they've known each other for a very long time – and so he breathes heavily. "Rachel's pregnant". He hears her shocked squeak and he nods, tired. "Yeah. It's St. Jerk's. And he doesn't want to have anything to do with them".

"That bastard!" Santana hisses furiously, and proceeds to curse angrily in Spanish. "B and I are on our way. And don't worry, Puck – we have her back". He hears Brittany's confused voice filtering in from some point behind Santana. "Later, Puck", she says, and ends the call. He turns on his ignition, and drives off.

St. Jerk and I are in need of some serious fucking conversation, and he has postponed it long enough.


	4. 3

**Author's Note: **I don't even know where this story came from, but it stuck with me. Hope you like it. For this to work, consider that Rachel lost her virginity to Jesse after 'Bad Reputation', but everything else happened exactly like it did in canon.

Thank you for the reviews, the alerts and the favorites. It's so cool to see that people are liking this crazy little plot bunny that won't leave me alone. Please check the St. Berry twist of this plot – 'Fatherhood'. I'm on a Jesse/Rachel roll right now (blame the awesomeness that are Lea Michele and Jon Groff) and, when I couldn't pick the main pairing for this, I decided to write both! It's possible that they'll be updated simultaneously.

Keep in mind that for this to work, Rachel and Jesse had their first time after 'Bad Reputation'. Everything else happened exactly like in canon.

**Disclaimer: **No, RM, the Insane, hasn't adopted me yet.

**To Be A Father**

_**Three**_

**S**afe in the knowledge that Santana and Brittany are keeping Rachel company while he does what he has to, he drives to his house, showers quickly, tells his mother he'll stay over at Berry's for some days until her fathers come back from their trip and rushes out, not offering an explanation for his hurry (which he knows it won't be a problem with his mother since she's already planning his wedding to Berry and shit like that. Anne Puckerman is fucking crazy, legit).

He jumps back in his truck and drives to Carmel. Jesse St. Jerk has a fucking lot of explanation to give. And he has an ass-kicking to deliver.

Puck makes the drive to Carmel pretty quickly. He had earlier hacked into Berry's laptop and quickly scribbled St. Jerk's address on a piece of clean paper. He knows Berry will be pissed with him once she hears what he'll do to St. Jerk, but someone needs to kick some sense into his ass, and who better than him, the boy who was forced to give up his little girl the day before? St. Jerk is fucking _loaded_, he has no excuse to turn his back on his baby and baby mama.

(Other than being a bastard, that is).

He arrives at the St. James manor and presses the door bell insistently. He has no idea whatsoever of what he'll say if it's a maid or some shit like that who answers the door, but luckily it's Jesse who answers, his eyes widening with arm and something very close to worry flashing in his face before the cool, collected mask returns to its rightful place. "Puckerman? It's awfully early for you to come knock at my door", St. Jerk says coolly, and all Puck sees in front of him is Rachel crying brokenly. His blood boils, and he doesn't even stop to think: he pulls his fist back and slams it against his nose.

"Fuck!" Jesse croaks, and Puck leaps at him, punching him hard, all the time with the image of Rachel crying in his eyes, and the sound of her sobs in his ears. He has thrown quite some punches into St. Jerk's face when he realizes that Rachel's baby daddy isn't fighting back. In fact, he has this resigned expression on his face, like he knows he's fucked it up and wants to be punished for it.

Puck steps back, breathing heavily, and looks long and hard at the other boy. After a moment, he says, "You're not fighting me off". Jesse shakes his head negatively, his eyes hollow and sad, and he sits down on the open doorway, Puck throwing himself on the small porch while still examining him.

"Of one thing I want you to be certain, Puckerman – I love Rachel. She's the one for me, has been since the moment I saw her singing at you guys' Sectionals" Jesse says quietly. "And I know she's having my child, who I love too. She's not the kind of girl to lie about something this huge just for payback. She'll be an amazing mother, because she has the biggest heart I've ever seen in someone".

Puck stays quiet because he agrees. St. James shuts up for a moment, looking thoughtful, before he looks down and sighs deeply. "But I don't. I'm ready to be a father; I don't want to be a father right now. If I get involved in Rachel's pregnancy, I won't be able to leave her in the fall to go to UCLA, meaning I'll have to give up on my dreams and will end up resenting Rachel and the baby. I don't want this to happen, and Rachel and the child don't deserve it. So, for her sake, for the baby's sake and for my sake, it's best if I walk away now".

St. James' words echo in Puck's mind, and he reluctantly is forced to admit that the former lead of Vocal Adrenaline is right on his motives to want to stay away from Rachel and their baby. Deep down, both he and St. James want to do what's best for their children and baby mamas. For Puck, it meant caring for Quinn during half her pregnancy and giving Beth up for adoption. For St. James, it's to walk away from his girlfriend and unborn baby (both of whom he loves), because to stay will only cause more hurt and pain in the future.

Puck rises and helps St. James up, the two teenagers coming to a silent understanding. Puck holds his hand out, and St. James takes it, shaking it firmly. "Puck, you're a good guy. Promise me you'll stick around Rachel and her baby".

Puck walks away without answering, because that's a promise he made to himself and to Rachel the moment she slipped her positive pregnancy test into his hand. He'll take care of Rachel and her baby, helping her out in what he can.

**

* * *

M**eanwhile, at the Berry household, Rachel wakes up to the sound of Britney Spears coming from the living room, two female voices that she recognizes quite well singing along. She frowns, because what are Brittany and Santana doing at her house? A quick glance outside tells her that Noah must have left when she was asleep, so she takes a quick shower, changes and go downstairs.

"Good morning, sunshine!" Brittany greets her happily, hugging her tightly. "I hope we didn't wake you up, but Coach Sylvester taught us a new routine to Britney's 'Toxic', so we were rehearsing!" She pulls Rachel into the living room, and she smiles at the blonde and the Latina, who nods at her in greetings.

"Berry, Puck went to run some errands for his mama and will be right back", Santana says coolly, but she leaves the kitchen and returns with an unopened bottle of Gatorade and a packet of crackers, both of which she hands to Rachel. "It'll help with the morning sickness", she says softly, and Rachel widens her eyes in panic and fear.

Santana notices this and tunes down the TV volume before turning to Rachel. "Look, Berry, no one deserves going through what Quinn did. At least you've done the decent thing – you told St. Jerk about the baby. His loss if he doesn't want to be a part of his kid's life. I can assure you that the guys at glee will be more than happy to help. Puck especially".

Rachel's eyes fill with tears. "I don't understand why you guys are being so nice to me".

"I like you!" Brittany says brightly, wrapping her arms around the brunette and hugging her quickly, and Santana's whole demeanor softens immediately.

"You may be annoying and super irritating and have the fashion sense of a blind nun, RB, but you're on our team. And when you're part of a team, you look out for each other. Kinda like you did giving fake panties to Jewfro so that he wouldn't blog about Quinn being preggo earlier last year".

"We're friends", Brittany states with a smile, and Rachel has to fight back the urge to cry. Her baby may not have a father, but it has a mother and a whole bunch of crazy aunties to look after it.


	5. 4

**Author's Note: **I don't even know where this story came from, but it stuck with me. Hope you like it. For this to work, consider that Rachel lost her virginity to Jesse after 'Bad Reputation', but everything else happened exactly like it did in canon.

Thank you for the reviews, the alerts and the favorites. It's so cool to see that people are liking this crazy little plot bunny that won't leave me alone. I'm so sorry for the time I've taken to update – it's just that I've been (and still am) on a Jesse/Rachel roll right now (blame the adorable/cute/sexy awesomeness that go by Lea Michele and Jon Groff) and, when I couldn't pick the main pairing for this, I decided to write both! It's possible that they'll be updated simultaneously.

Keep in mind that for this to work, Rachel and Jesse had their first time after 'Bad Reputation'. Everything else happened exactly like in canon.

**Disclaimer: **No, RM, the Insane, hasn't adopted me yet. The song, even though adapted, belongs to Creed.

**To Be A Father**

_**Four**_

**H**e returns to her house to find her, Santana and Brittany dancing and singing along to Justin Timberlake's first solo record _Justified_. He leans against the doorjamb and watches them, watches her, a small smile playing on his lips. She has the 'Give Up The Funk' red-pink shorts and a formfitting white tank top on, and her hair falls down her back all wavy and shiny. Maybe he's seeing it, but she already has that rosy glow that people say pregnant girls all get. The song the girls are singing comes to an end and they fall on the couch, laughing and panting, and he slowly begins to clap. The three girls look up, and he smirks at them. "Amazing performance, ladies".

Santana smirks and winks, Brittany giggles and Rachel blushes with a shy smile. She skips to where he is and hugs him tight, and is smiling all big and happy. "Hey", he greets her softly, an arm around her waist and the other on her flat stomach. "How are you guys doing?" He asks quietly, and Santana busies Brittany with a new song ('Lady Marmalade'), turning up the volume so the two teens on the doorway can have a little bit of privacy.

She smiles and shrugs. "It's okay. Still sick half out of my mind, but… Having them here…" Rachel glances at the two Cheerios. "… It made me feel less alone. They've been super supportive".

He nods and then pulls her towards the porch. "We need to talk, Rach". She sighs and nods and they settle on the front steps of her house. He leans against the pillar and she comes to rest between their legs (since their fling last year they are extremely touchy-feely with each other, fuck you if you don't get it). "What are you going to tell everyone?" He asks quietly.

"That I'm pregnant with my ex's baby, and he doesn't want anything to do with it", she whispers, and he squeezes her a little. He's silent for a moment, and then it escapes his mouth.

"No. Tell them it's my baby".

She squeaks in shock and indignation, eyes wide and jaw to the floor. Her face turns to look at his, and she is absolutely confused. "Noah Puckerman, no. It's not your child; it's not your responsibility. It's mine, and Jesse's even if he doesn't want it".

"Rachel", he urges her. "Think about it. Do you want everyone thinking you're a silly little girl who got knocked up by her bastard of a boyfriend? Half the school is thinking we're fucking already. It won't come as a shock".

"Noah…" She still is surprised and shocked. Noah wants to assume her baby as his? "It's not fair. It's not your baby. Jesse is just upset with everything but he will come to his senses and he will want to be a part of his baby's life and then what?"

"He won't, Rachel", he says bluntly. She stares at him speechlessly, and he nods again. "He won't. Jesse doesn't want this baby, he doesn't want you, so please stop trying to fool yourself. It's just you and me, and you know **I** want to be a father, hell, I was ready to care for Beth the minute Finn blurted Q was preggo". Her eyes are full of tears (he feels a little twinge of regret at crushing her hopes so harshly, but he knows the truth – no matter how much Jesse loves Rachel, he loves his future more), and she curls against him. He wraps his arms around her and allows her to cry against his chest, humming softly.

"Let me take care of you, Rach. And of your baby. I want to be a father, I'm ready to be a dad – I've been for months now. Please". He whispers, and he's anxious for a long minute, until he feels Rachel nodding weakly against him, her hair tickling his chin. He hugs her a little tighter and whispers, "It'll be okay. I promise".

From the window, Brittany and Santana watch silently, the blonde resting her cheek against the Latina's shoulder. "How long do you think…", she asks quietly, "… before he realizes he is in love with her?"

Santana watches the quiet duo on the porch, eyes trailing from the sobbing Rachel to the relaxed Puck, and she sighs. "I think that in a deep level he already knows he is, Brit".

"Yeah, me too".

**

* * *

M**onday comes and with it comes Rachel having to face the gleeks for the first time since finding out she's pregnant. Santana and Brittany are flanking her, both in their Cheerio outfits, and Noah arrives shortly with Quinn, the blonde looking at her sympathetically – Rachel guesses Noah must have told her about her pregnancy, but she walks past them and the brunette sighs in relief.

Noah finds her shortly after and kisses her forehead affectionately, whispering softly against her skin that everything is going to turn out fine. She notices the shocked, surprised glances from everyone (and the not so hushed whispers that point out she is already with a new boyfriend after breaking up with Jesse a week ago), and clutches his jacket's fabric in her hands. He scowls at everyone (and their audience scatter, thank fuck) and gently leads her to the choir room, Brittany and Santana keeping guard at the door. "You telling the gleeks today about the baby?" He asks quietly, her small hand encased in his larger ones.

She nods and takes a deep breath. "Yeah, I'll… I'll sing a song", she whispers, eyes glued to his hands, and the right corner of his lips curl up in the shadow of a smile.

"Of course you will", he laughs softly and squeezes her hand gently. Slowly the other gleeks trickle in, eyes widening as they absorb Rachel and Puck's fingers entwined. Finn narrows his eyes but Rachel ignores him (his declaration of love weighing in her conscience) and waits with baited breath as Mr. Schue walks in.

"Okay, everyone-" He starts, but she interrupts him.

"Mr. Schue, there's something I'd like to sing for my fellow team mates, if I may". She doesn't even wait for his answer, just marches to the bassist and whispers the name of the song in his ear. He looks shocked at her and nods, and she settles in one of the stools the boys wore for 'Beth' as the first accords cut the air.

_Well I just heard the news today_

_It seems my life is gonna change_

_I close my eyes, begin to pray_

_And tears of joy stream down my face_

Noah watches as realization dawns in Artie and his face is a mask of shock and surprise (he _knew_ Artie would be the first to pick up – dude is like psychic or some shit like that). Artie's eyes meet his with the unspoken question and he nods (because fuck yeah, for all intentions and purposes it's _his _baby).

_With arms wide open, under the sunlight_

_Welcome to this place – I'll show you everything_

_With arms wide open_

_With arms wide open_

Matt and Mike are the next to understand, and like Artie they come to the conclusion it's his baby, Kurt and Mercedes looking on in shock. Beyoncé's eyes then turn greedy and judgmental, and Quinn glares at him, punching his shoulder swiftly and hissing at him to shut the fuck up, making Puck shoot a grateful glance at her direction, to which she nods curtly.

_Well I don't know if I'm ready_

_To be the mom I have to be_

_I'll take a breath – I'll have him by my side_

_I'll stand in awe, I've created life_

Her eyes are on him when she sings this part, and he smiles encouragingly, even though her eyes are full of tears. Santana and Brittany stand up and come to stop next to Rachel, arms wrapped around her, and they sing along. He does the same, coming to stand behind her, his hand on her shoulder, and she closes her eyes, two thick tears running down her cheeks.

_With arms wide open, under the sunlight_

_Welcome to this place – I'll show you everything_

_With arms wide open – now everything has changed_

_I'll show you love – I'll show you everything_

_With arms wide open_

He takes over the next part, his hand coming to splay on her stomach. She leans against him and her eyes notice Mr. Schue's stunned, pale face, and Finn's narrowed eyes. Santana picks on it too and gently tugs her aside, eyes glancing at Noah and then at Finn in explanation. Noah nods and lets her go, and Quinn and Mercedes join the Latina and the brunette.

_If I had just one wish – only one demand_

_I hope he's not like me – I hope he understands_

_That he can take this life, and hold it by his hands_

_And he can greet the world, with arms wide open_

_Wide open_

He finishes singing, and she smiles weakly at him. Finn stands up, fuming, approaches Noah – and punches the living daylights out of him.

Rachel screams.


	6. 5

**Author's Note: **I don't even know where this story came from, but it stuck with me. Hope you like it. For this to work, consider that Rachel lost her virginity to Jesse after 'Bad Reputation', but everything else happened exactly like it did in canon.

Keep in mind that for this to work, Rachel and Jesse had their first time after 'Bad Reputation'. Everything else happened exactly like in canon.

Sorry, sorry, sorry for the long delay! I'm graduating in less than a month and things are _crazy _here. Uh… I apologize in advance for Finn being a lot OOC in this chapter. I don't like him, I don't know how to write him, I think he's a sorry excuse of human being.

**Disclaimer: **No, RM, the Insane, hasn't adopted me yet.

**To Be A Father**

_**Five**_

"**F**inn! Stop it!" She is screaming and crying, struggling against Quinn's and Santana's iron grips on her arms. Finn is still trying to punch Noah's face into a bloody pulp, and he seems infused of anger and fury, because Matt and Mike and even Kurt are trying to get him off Noah, and they're failing. Mercedes tries to help too and she even elbows Finn on the side but he doesn't relent. "Mr. Schue, do something!" She screams, her voice breaking in the last word. "Finn! Don't!" She pleads and cries and her voice propels their coach into action – he pulls Finn by the back of his shirt with strength enough to send him toppling back. Mike and Matt stand between the fallen Noah and fuming Finn, who is being held back by Mr. Schue. Quinn and Santana deem the situation safe enough and let go of her, and she rushes to Noah's side, kneeling next to him and examining his bruised and battered face. "Oh, my God, Noah…" She whispers desperately, and he smiles at her.

"It's all cool, babe, I promise. It looks worse than it feels", he mumbles, and she turns to glare at Finn, standing up and marching up at him.

"What were you thinking, Finn? Why did you punch Noah?" She yells, and he narrows his eyes at her.

"What was _I _thinking? What were _you _thinking when you fucked that bastard?" He yells back, and Noah narrows his eyes at him. The girls flinch and Mr. Schue is telling everyone to just _cool off _and talk it out, and Rachel is shaking and trembling.

"Don't-" She tries to warn him off, but he ignores her.

"But what could I expect from the girl that fucked _Jesse St. James_ as soon as he showed some interest? The one that dressed as a _hooker _to fuck me? I was right that night, you know – you're nothing but a sad, pathetic _slut_" Finn sneers, and a collective gasp is heard. Rachel flinches, Mike and Matt are struggling to contain Puck, who is screaming bloody murder, and Santana has enough.

"HUDSON, SHUT UP!" The Latina roars, her arm around Rachel. "Who the fuck do you think you are to call Rachel a slut? If she slept with Jesse, at least she did it with her _boyfriend_. At least she didn't promise you one week that she wouldn't give up that easy on you, and the next was hopping on the sack with me! You did all that, you lying piece of shit, and you think you have the backbone to scold Rachel on what she did? You _fucked_ me, you fucked _me_ – and yet after you've taken care of your pathetic little problem you still sat next to me and said it meant nothing! At least, for Rachel, she lost it to someone who meant something! God, you're disgusting, pathetic!"

Rachel's eyes are wide and shocked as she stares Finn. "Is this true?" She whispers. Finn's flaming cheeks and the way he avoids her eyes are confirmation enough – he lied to her, again. "And yet the next Monday you stood in front of me in this same room and told me nothing had happened. You looked me in the eye and said you were going to wait for the one…" She shakes her head disgustedly and glares at him. "We're done, Finn. We have been for a long time now, but this time, I don't even want to be friends. Who I have intercourse with is nothing of your business. At least, Jesse and Noah never lied to me".

Finn laughs bitterly. "That's what you tell yourself to help you sleep at night?" He spits venomously.

"No", Rachel says calmly. "But how I found out what Jesse did and didn't lie about to me, it's for me to know, only me, and my _friends_. And you're not one of them, Finn. Stay away from me. In fact, forget that I even exist." She turns to Mr. Schue, blocking Finn out, and says calmly, "Mr. Schue, I'm offering now my resignation from the glee club. I need to have a happy, healthy, peaceful pregnancy and it's clear that I can't do it while having to deal with a jealous ex-boyfriend", she states coolly, and everyone gasps.

"Rachel, don't", Noah staggers up and approaches her. "You love glee, babe. You can't quit just because of that jerk", he whispers to her, but she shakes her head.

"I can't stay either, Noah. Did you hear what he just called me? He thinks I'm a _slut _because I slept with my then-boyfriend. I can't be around someone so toxic. I can't. And I won't".

"Rachel, you can't quit", Quinn says, glowering quickly at Finn before focusing back at the smaller brunette. "Actually… You don't have to. Glee is over. We didn't place at regionals, remember?" She says with a teasing smile, and Rachel laughs, but Mr. Schue clears his throat awkwardly.

"Actually…" He scratches the back of his neck and sighs deeply. "We got another year".

One can hear the cling of a falling pin on the floor in the silence that ensues. The twelve teens stare at him stunned, before bursting in cheers. Rachel watches them for a moment and smiles sadly before quietly sneaking out – even though she loves performing, she loves the little baby growing inside her more. And she can't stand being in Finn Hudson's vicinity. She always knew he was a little bit spoiled and selfish, but the things he just called her – he had been intentionally cruel.

She feels two arms wrapping around her waist and turns around to look into the concerned hazel eyes of one Noah Puckerman. "You okay, babe? And baby?" He asks quietly, and she nods with a weak smile, wiping her teary eyes. He looks at her for a moment before pressing a kiss to her forehead. "It'll all be fine, Rach. I promise you", he whispers against her skin, feeling her shiver and tremble slightly in his arms.

**

* * *

T**he next day finds Rachel, Noah, her daddy Hiram and her dad Leroy all reunited on the Berry's living room. She had called him the previous night to say she was going to tell her parents about the baby and Jesse's abandonment, and he had promised her he would be there. He had arrived half an hour before Hiram and Leroy came home from work and now the four of them are sitting on the den, Rachel's hands firmly encased in Noah's larger one, her fathers staring curiously at her. "What's wrong, baby girl?" Hiram, the smaller, mellower of the two men, asks quietly, eyes fixed on his daughter.

She exchanges a nervous glance with Noah, who nods reassuringly at her, and takes a deep breath before focusing her eyes on the polished center table. "I'm pregnant", she whispers, clutching desperately at Noah's hands. He massages hers softly, his eyes trained on her fathers. Hiram looks stunned, Leroy seems perplexed. Noah tugs gently at Rachel's hand and she looks up, brown eyes full of tears. "It's Jesse's, and… He doesn't it. Us. He doesn't want us", she whispers. The tears begin rolling down her cheeks and she turns panicked, pleading eyes to Leroy, her dad, the disciplinarian. "Please don't kick me out", she begs, and Leroy rushes to her side.

"Oh, baby girl, why would we? You didn't plan on getting pregnant, and it would be hypocritical of us to send you away from our home. We're not happy that this child is on its way, but we're not going to expel you or turn your back on you", he says, hugging her tight, and Rachel falls apart in his arms, big, heartbroken sobs escaping her lips.

"I'm so scared, daddy", she mumbles against Hiram's shirt, and he strokes her hair, humming softly against the crown of her head. Leroy finally seems to come to his senses and turns to Noah, inquisitive eyes set on him.

"What are you doing here, Noah?" Leroy's thick, throaty voice is gentle, but curious, and Noah stares him head on.

"Rachel and I agreed we're telling everyone at school that I'm her baby's father", he replies politely, but firmly. Hiram and Leroy gasp and look stunned at the young man sitting on their couch, eyes full of confusion. Noah sighs and carries on, "I was forced to give my daughter up. Jesse St. James doesn't want a family. I do. I was ready to offer everything to my daughter and her mother, but Quinn took it all from me".

"Rachel's child won't replace your own daughter, Noah", Leroy said kindly.

"Mr. Berry, no child deserves to grow without a father. I've done it, and, believe me, there are some things a mother can't provide a kid with. Nina had me for all the stuff she should have learnt from our own father, but I had no one and, quite frankly, it sucked".

Hiram sighs. "Why don't you just tell the truth?"

It's Rachel who laughs bitterly. "That won't do any good. I'll be even more shunned". Hiram and Leroy look alarmed at their daughter, who then sighs and falls back on the couch. "Finn called me a slut".

"I'll kill him!" Leroy booms angrily, standing up. "I'll kill that freakishly tall white boy for calling my little girl a slut!" He begins to pace agitatedly on the floor, Hiram rushing to put a hand on his shoulder.

"Leroy. Calm down. This isn't the time for you to go beat up some high school kid for something I'm sure he didn't mean to", he says quietly, and Noah would snort in derision if he weren't so busy watching Rachel. She looks exhausted and drained and one step away from passing out on the couch. He slides up next to her on the couch and puts a hand on her shoulder, concern darkening his handsome features.

"Hey… You cool there?" He asks quietly, worried eyes watching the pale feminine face.

Rachel nods and smiles weakly. "It's been just a long, draining day", she whispers.

He chuckles. "Tell me about it. But, hey, it's all out in the open now, right? It can only get better".

She smiles exhaustedly. "I hope you're right, Noah. I really hope you're right".


	7. 6

**Author's Note: **Fifty days for the return of Sexy St. James!

Don't worry. Jesse won't come back. I needed to insert him in this chapter (better yet, my muse did) for Rachel to finally see he won't come back and focus on who she has around. Believe me, the romance will start very, very soon.

**Disclaimer: **No, RM, the Insane, hasn't adopted me yet.

**To Be a Father**

_**Six**_

**T**he next days are filled with baby-related things. Puck takes Rachel to her doctor appointment (with Eloise Powell, who has dark hair and blue-grey eyes that break Rachel's heart because they're so familiar to those Rachel looked into so lovingly while conceiving her baby), and Puck smiles at the young, pretty doctor when he shakes her hand and introduces himself as the dad. They're given a due date (late February, early March), and they hear the baby's heartbeat (Rachel cries and Puck's eyes are filled with tears).

Quinn moves out of the Joneses house and back into with her mother, and Rachel, Tina, Santana and Brittany all go help her pack. The blonde then gives Rachel her maternity clothes, and Rachel is grateful even though she hasn't started showing yet. Hiram and Leroy decide to turn the guest room next to Rachel's into a nursery, and they bring down Rachel's white crib and rocking chair from the attic.

Noah is always there – always present whenever something related to the baby is happening. He always looks so happy, so excited, that Rachel often cries herself to sleep wondering why he couldn't really be the daddy. Noah's who suggests she takes weekly pictures of her belly, so she can chronicle its growth.

She calls Jesse every time she misses him, but always hangs up without leaving a message. She e-mails him updates on the baby and her baby and belly pictures, but he never replies.

(He cries every time he sees her number on his caller ID. All the baby pictures she sends him, he saves. The pictures of her stomach make him half-proud, half-doubtful. He wonders if he's made the right choice. But then Puck calls, sounding so happy, proud and excited for the baby, and he knows he'll never feel the same. Every time he talks to Puck, he tells him to take good care of Rachel and the baby).

(Puck would ask him for godfather if, you know, it wouldn't upset Rachel).

July quickly turns into August, and Rachel is halfway through her first trimester. She's almost ten weeks into her pregnancy when something she was dreading to happen, happens.

She, Noah and Hiram are window shopping on Akron mall, Rachel's hand firmly encased inside Noah's, the three of them talking quite animatedly about nursery patterns (Hiram wants to paint the nursery a pale green, Rachel wants to wait until they know the baby's sex, and Noah is cool either way), when Rachel feels the hairs on the back of her neck prickling uncomfortably. She distractedly rubs the spot, looking around – and freezes.

Her mother is staring at her, eyes wide in surprise as she sees Noah's relaxed stance, the way he's holding her hand. Shelby's eyes then fall to the shopping bag in her hand (she's bought a tiny pair of red shoes, for the baby to wear when they leave the hospital – a tradition to assure health and good luck, according to Hiram), and the surprise turns to shock.

Rachel can't find in herself the strength to move, and Noah notices something is wrong with her. He looks at the direction she's staring, and the dazed brunette feels him stiffen next to her. But his eyes aren't fixed at her mother.

He's looking blankly at the tiny girl dressed in pink and white, peacefully sleeping in the baby carrier Shelby holds oh-so-cautiously. Rachel's heart cracks open as she realizes exactly _why _her friend is so tense and inexpressive. The ache in her heart turns unbearable as she also realizes what this means for _her_.

Shelby has Beth with her. Beth. The daughter Noah was forced to give up. The baby girl Shelby chose to replace Rachel with.

Her eyes fill with tears immediately, and she briskly turns her back to Shelby, almost running away. Hiram looks sadly at the woman who gave his daughter life and shakes his head at her when she makes a move to follow Rachel, before he silently tugs at Noah's arm, both following the heartbroken brunette.

**

* * *

S**he doesn't know what propels her to pick her phone and dial blindly the number she knows by heart for months now. He never answers, but she needs him right now. She just needs him. Even if it's his voice on his voicemail message, she'll take it.

"Jess, it's me", she whispers brokenly, voice thick with the tears running down her cheeks. "I know you want to stay away, but I really need you now. Please call me back". She hangs up, hiding her face in her hands as she sobs.

_Let me start by saying… I love you_. Her phone rings, and the tiny noise brings her a relief so great she is shaking when she accepts the call. "Rachel?" His voice is frantic, worried (because her leaving a message on his voicemail is a change on their dynamic, and the tears in her voice left him in panic). "What's wrong?"

"Jess…" She cries softly, falling heavily on the nearest bench. "I… I…"

"Rach!" Noah's voice interrupts her stammering, and she looks up at the man pretending to be her baby's father. Noah's eyes are distraught and worried, and he sweeps in, taking her in his arms and holding her tight. "I'm so sorry, babe…" He mumbles against her hair, and she clutches at her phone with one hand, and at Noah's shirt front with the other. Jesse is silent on his end of the line, and she doesn't know what to do. She looks up over Noah's shoulder and sees her daddy busying himself with something (blatantly giving her and Noah some privacy) and she burrows into Noah's warmth. He's massaging her back, looking curiously at her phone, and she mouths 'Jesse' at him.

His eyes darken and flash, but he nods, and she takes a deep breath. "Jess…" She mumbles, and the boy in California starts breathing easier because for a moment she was too quiet for his liking.

"Are you okay, Rachel?" The tone of his voice lets her know he's not worried about her only – he's worried with the baby inside her too, and this warms her heart. She nods for a moment before she realizes he can't see her.

"Yes… Noah is here with me", she puts a hand on Noah's cheek with a grateful smile, and he leans into her warmth, kissing her palm softly (she's surprised when the peck leaves her tingling). "I saw Shelby just now", she explains to Jesse, and she nods at his sharp intake of breath. "Yes and…" She takes a deep breath at what she has to say next, tightening her grip on Noah's shirt. "… She had Beth with her. Beth is Noah's daughter".

Jesse inhales sharply, his own heart breaking for Rachel. "I'm sorry, Rach", he whispers, and she nods silently, feeling the warmth of Noah's large hand resting on her lower back, his palm splayed open over the flimsy fabric of her shirt. "Is… Is Puck taking good care of you guys?" Jesse asks quietly, and Rachel nods firmly.

"Yes… He's awesome, Jesse", she whispers, her eyes fixed on Noah's Adam apple. She hears Jesse swallow and she reflexively tightens her grip on Noah's shirt.

"I'm… I'm glad, Rach. He's a good guy". He sighs deeply. "He's going to be a great father for your baby".

"My… _My _baby?" She repeats, eyes filling with tears. He's silent for a moment, and despair grips at her heart with the same strength she's gripping Noah's shirt. "Will you come… When I give birth?" She asks desperately.

"Rachel… I love you. You know I do. But… I don't want to be a father. I'm not ready for it. And if I go for your birth, I… I won't be able to leave. I won't be able to make my dreams come true. I'll end up hating and resenting you. And the baby. And you deserve better. It deserves better", he says honestly, and Rachel sobs quietly into the phone, her face pressed against Noah's chest. "I'm sorry", Jesse whispers, desperate.

"Never", she whispers. "Never, Jesse St. James". She slides the phone closed and drops it into her purse, tears running down her cheeks, wetting Noah's shirt. She has no idea why she's crying over anymore: partly because of her mother's abandonment, partly because of her disappointment with Jesse's decision not to be a part of their child's life (she had heard it from Noah, but it feels so much worse coming from Jesse himself), partly over Noah's heartbroken heart.

"Shush, baby… Don't cry", Noah whispers, his arms tight around her slim waist. "It'll all be okay, I promise". He tightens his hold on her and gives his best to calm her down, knowing fully well why she reached for St. James, why she's crying so desperately against him. Part of her, he knows, still held to that hope that Jesse would come back and make it alright, make the three of them a family.

His own phone begins to vibrate against his thigh, and he picks it up, only to see St. James' number flashing on his call ID. Rolling his eyes, he turns the device off and focuses on the crying girl in his arms. "C'mon, babe, let's go home", he mumbles quietly, and slowly he begins to lead her away.


	8. 7

**Author's Note: **Thirty days for the return of Sexy St. James!

Will my awesomely faithful readers be a bunch of sweeties and go check the new stories of my friend MissElliexXxXx, 'Piece of Harmony' and 'Quinn in Wonderland'? Read them and, when you review (please do!), tell her I've sent you. She can use a supportive bunch like you guys.

A big, gigantic, enormous thank you to Ellie and Ash (gleek06216) for their help with this chapter. I struggled with it and their input helped me through it.

You guys and my writing made my crazy ride year bearable. Thank you for the support, the kind words and the reviews. I love you guys so much. May the new year bring you everything you want! Also, if anyone knows anything about Jon's return in the back episodes, I'll be eternally grateful. I'm going mad without spoilers.

**Disclaimer: **No, RM, the Insane, hasn't adopted me yet. Not even close.

**To Be a Father**

_**Seven**_

**R**achel spends the weeks after the disastrous Jesse call in a deep funk, which, of course, sends Noah and Santana into a concerned fit of rage. It takes Brittany begging – begging – to prevent the protective Latina from flying all the way to California to hunt Jesse's ass down and hand it over to him. Hiram and Leroy just make sure Rachel eats and is hydrated (which she does, and is), but they give their daughter space.

Noah crawls into bed with her every time he's over. She has stopped crying after the first two days, but he notices she has busied herself with some cleaning. Gone are all the tiny mementos of her relationship with Jesse (the Carebear, the pictures, her copy of the Lionel Richie songbook she was leafing through when they first met). Relief clutches at Noah's heart, because finally, finally!, she's free of Jesse's shadow.

He's used to just lie there holding her until his mother calls or one of her dads kicks him out. He likes it. She's always soft and sweetly scented and he realizes he never spent so much time in a woman's bed without fucking her. It's a nice change.

(He has been celibate for months now. Ever since Q moved in and laid down the law: if they were together, he would refrain from bedding willing Cheerios and cougars alike. He complied, even though it meant he spent more time than usual under the shower – hell, he even showered more often. Now he's used to it).

"I thought… I thought he loved me", she whispers, her voice rough from being silenced for so long (who knew Rachel Berry, loud, talkative, always-singing Rachel could manage to stay with her lips sealed for so long? It was a surprise for him).

He sighs and just cuddles her closer to him, massaging her lower back. "I don't think he doesn't love you, Rach. But he has a point. He has dreams he wants to achieve, and he's selfish enough to crack an egg to your head to make sure he'll achieve them. If he stayed behind to take care of you and the baby, he'd feel trapped and end up hating you and your baby. You two deserve better."

"What about you?" She asks quietly. "Don't you feel trapped too? Especially considering this is not your child, not really".

"Rachel…" He sighs and rubs his eyes. "It's different. I grew up fatherless. It sucks. If it was hard for my mother, who was a grownup, to raise two kids by herself, I don't want to imagine how it would be for a teenage girl". He knows Rachel, he knows how she thinks. He knows their entire relationship is depending on how this conversation turns out to be. "I'm not my father, or Jesse. I don't have dreams that are bigger than my family. My dad wanted to be a rockstar, did you know that? And he left because he had a new gig and mom didn't want to pack our entire life up and leave".

"What are your dreams, Noah?" Rachel asks softly, because she doesn't want to grow attached to this man, her child to grow attached to this man, if he doesn't have ambitions. She knows sometimes it's your ambitions that will help you make through the day, and that's a lesson she'll pass up to her baby.

"I want to be an architect" he admits quietly, flushing slightly. "I like to build stuff and, contrary to what people say, I know my math. I just choose not to go to class, but I have a B+ average grade on it", he tells her, smiling at her shocked look. "I'm not just a stupid jock, Rach".

"I never said you are!" The brunette replies defensively. "It's just that… Well, honestly I'm the only one in our group that is vocal about what are my post-high school plans. Since we're now sharing a life, somewhat, I want to know what your plans are".

He nods slowly. It makes sense, in a Rachel Berry kind of way. "You always have to plan, don't you, B?" He asks with a smile. "Never thought, 'what the fuck, I'll just wing it'?"

"Yes", she whispers, hand involuntarily moving to her stomach, and he understands: the day she winged, she ended up sleeping with St. James and pregnant with his baby. He hugs her tight and kisses her forehead.

"So, what do you want the kid to be?" Puck decides to change topic because for the first time in days Rachel isn't bawling her eyes out and he wants to keep her tear-free for a while, thank you very much. She smiles and puts her hand on her bumpy stomach, softly caressing it.

"I know it sounds cliché, but I don't care… As long as it's healthy, I'll be happy with having a little boy or a little girl". She quiets and then asks softly, "When Quinn was pregnant… What did you want?"

He sighs and then thinks for a moment. "When I first heard she was pregnant… I wanted to have a little boy. I mean… I'm a guy, I know what boys like. I could teach him about football, basketball – sports in general. I could teach him how to love the same music I do. I could also teach him 'trust me' isn't the safest contraceptive method there is; the right way to treat a girl – the way a man is supposed to-"

She bursts out laughing, and he smiles wryly as he understands the reasons for her laughter (do as I say, not as I do, anyone?) and pushes her lightly. "Hey, you know I can commit if I think the girl deserves me committing", he says teasingly, but with a serious glimmer in his eyes. "Remember last fall? I committed to one girl and one girl only then".

Rachel blushes involuntarily, her mind flashing back to that oasis-like week where she and Noah weirdly found themselves entangled in a romantic relationship (before he was left heartbroken by having to give up his baby girl, and she, heartbroken by being left behind by her former boyfriend, who impregnated her).

She clears her throat nervously. "So, at first you wanted a baby boy", she eggs him on, and he nods.

"Yeah, plus, it'd be awesome to have someone to carry on my last name", he adds somewhat sheepishly, and she rolls her eyes, because, well, figures. Men, it looks like, think sons continue the family line.

"But then you found out it was a little girl", she interrupts quietly, and he nods.

"Yeah… And the first thing I thought was that I needed to buy the biggest, thickest, heaviest baseball bat I could find. Because, I mean – she's my daughter, she'll be a beauty once she grows up. I wanted to be prepared to scare off all the boys that threatened to soil my doorstep". He nods once, firmly, and Rachel laughs so hard tears run down her cheeks.

(He's grateful it's tears of laughter instead of sadness).

"And then… Then I imagined everything that came with being daddy to a daughter. Her first word would be dada. I'd teach her how to play guitar. Take her to ballet lessons. Watch her recitals. Play tea parties. Look under her bed when she was scared there were monsters waiting for her to fall asleep so they could take her away. Teach her to kick the ass of the jerk that didn't understand no means no. Sweet sixteen. Prom. Wedding". His voice is thick with the tears he doesn't allow himself to cry over the milestones he'll miss with the daughter he was denied to raise.

Rachel wraps her arms around him and presses her cheek to his chest, whispering quietly, "You will make an amazing daddy to _this_ baby, Noah. I just know it".

It's the first time she says it – with the belief that she's saying the truth to back it up. Quinn, she thinks, was stupid to forbid Noah the right to watch his little girl grow up. But she won't deny him the same right. Her baby is not his – not by a long shot, and will never biologically be – but he's choosing to be a dad to her child, and, honestly, she doesn't see a single reason to deny him his wish. He hugs her back, tightly, tears wetting the top of her head.


	9. 8

**Author's Note: **I am so sorry for the very long absence of updates lately. It has been so hard to actually stop and write. I'll be eternally grateful for all the reviews you guys leave.

**Disclaimer: **No, RM, the Insane, hasn't adopted me yet. Not even close.

**To Be a Father**

_**Eight**_

**I**n the aftermath of their emotionally charged conversation about what they wanted for their future, Rachel and Noah grow much closer. Santana and Brittany smile knowingly at each other as Rachel seems more at ease initiating contact with Puck. Somehow they're always somehow touching each other. It's like they can't be in the same room without their skins connecting to each other.

Puck's arm around Rachel's waist, caressing her flat stomach. Rachel's arm around Puck's, fingers digging on his bicep as she talks animatedly. Their fingers laced together as they take long walks on the park… There are countless samples of Puck and Rachel's physical affection for each other. For Rachel it's not surprising, but Puck is definitely not the touchy-feely kind of guy. For him to be so openly affectionate, it's a proof of how much he has changed.

Besides, Puck has stopped the partying altogether. Santana has lost track of how many times the Cheerios have bitched that he simply didn't show up at their parties, social happenings that were his favorite place to go on the prowl for new fresh meat or for a second round on the sack with one of them. Brittany giggles every time she hears someone pouting and complaining. "It's funny", she justifies to Santana every time the Latina stares at her as she's laughing. "They don't see Puck loves Rachel!"

"I don't think even Puck sees it, B", Santana says truthfully as she watches the young pair, snuggled together as they wait for the nurse to come fetch Rachel. The four teens are all on the waiting room of Rachel's physician, the two Cheerios having tagged along because Brittany wanted to see the baby. Rachel and Puck are talking quietly amongst themselves, an excited glimmer inside their eyes.

"Berry-Puckerman". An older, motherly-looking nurse appears on a doorway. Puck shoots up immediately, holding out a hand to Rachel, who giggles at his excitement and entwines her fingers with his. Right after the couple that isn't, Brittany and Santana exchange a meaningful look.

Eloise watches as the four teens fill up her office, a small smile on her lips. But as Rachel's doctor, she's no silly. Every now and then she catches the sad shadow that fogs the cheerful brown eyes, a fog that was thick at their first appointment, but slowly has been growing thinner. Curious at this, she slowly reads the file and follows after Rachel. "Rachel?" The physician asks before Rachel can change into the scrub to the examination. "Can I ask you a very personal question?" Rachel smiles at the slightly older woman and nods silently, fingers stroking absently her stomach. "Is Noah really your baby's father?"

The small brunette freezes up, turning sharply to look at Eloise's eyes. Ever since the first appointment, Noah has introduced himself as the father and Rachel never mentioned Jesse. After all, Rachel isn't stupid. She knows that if anyone ever thinks the baby is Jesse's – besides those few chosen people who already know: Brittany, Santana, her dads, Noah's mother and Noah himself – she'll be even more judged than she is now. But Eloise's eyes are sweet and understanding, not a hint of judgment or malice inside them. The soft look crumbles Rachel's defenses, and she shakes her head slowly, negatively.

"My former boyfriend got me pregnant", she whispers. "But, for all intents and purposes, yes, Noah is the father". Taking a deep, calming breath, Rachel looks straight at Elise's eyes. "Before you ask – Jesse St. James. He's my ex". She then retreats to the safety of the washroom, to put the scrubs on.

Eloise takes her time to recompose herself. Jesse is to be a _father_? Her _cousin_ got his girlfriend pregnant, and isn't taking responsibility? A spark of anger flares inside Eloise, because like everyone in her family she was taught since very little to atone to her actions. It isn't fair to Noah, to go through that because of a child that isn't his. It isn't fair to Rachel to live through the pregnancy alone.

Meanwhile, inside the washroom, Rachel herself is working on her composure. Eloise's question brought back the ocean of pain and heartbreak, the reminder of Jesse's refusal to be in their baby's life. _No_, she thinks as she examines her reflection on the mirror. _Jesse made his decision. He doesn't want to be a daddy. This is _**my **_baby. Mine and Noah's. _Squaring her shoulders, she leaves the room and walks to the office where Noah, Santana and Brittany are waiting.

As Rachel settles into the bed for the exam, Eloise walks in. She is determined to call her aunt, Jesse's mother, Claire, to tell her about the new grandbaby, a child Eloise is sure Jesse hasn't mentioned to his mother. But, as she turns into the machines, she freezes. She catches a glimpse of something, something deep inside Rachel's eyes as she and Noah hold hands, with childishly excited smiles.

Eloise sees love inside her patient's eyes. A deep and strong love. As she notices it, she hesitates in her drive to make Jesse take responsibility for this new life. Rachel is happy, healthy, clearly in love. Noah is almost like a little boy on Christmas morning. "Doc?" He asks as Eloise muses. Startled out of her reverie, she smiles and presses the radar on Rachel's stomach.

"Sorry. I was just so far away… Family issues". She shakes her head back into focus and turns the monitor on. "Let's see how this little baby is, okay?"

The image never fails to bring tears to Rachel's eyes. But this time she's not the only one. Brittany is openly bawling next to her, and even badass Santana has a thin sheen of tears in her eyes. Noah, squeezing Rachel's hand every now and then, smiles proudly. He's the one who tears his eyes away from the screen to make a question that Eloise has heard from hundreds of expecting parents.

"Can you tell us what it is?"

As soon as the question is done, Brittany squeals, nodding cheerfully. "Yes, yes, what Pucklebaby is?" Santana is more reserved, but her dark eyes betray her curiosity, as she rolls her eyes, amused, at Brit's nickname to Rachel's child.

The young doctor chuckles. "Does mommy want to know too?"

Glowingly happy, Rachel nods, eagerly. "Yes, please. I have been thinking and I decided I do want to know. A surprise delivery has its merits, but knowing early on makes easier for us to plan the nursery, the themes, buying clothes…"

Eloise laughs lowly and slides the radar against the cool transparent gel on Rachel's belly. The pregnant girl shivers and groans in displeasure, making Puck chuckle, and she pouts up at him. "Yeah, go ahead, laugh at your baby mama", she says in a whining voice. "You laugh because you're not the one feeling cold because of this", she adds, and even Santana laughs now.

As the pair bickers back and forth, with Santana offering her input every now and then and Brittany giggling all the time, Eloise examines the baby. It's growing nicely, its development progressing like expected. A big smile curves her lips as she detects the baby's sex, and she turns to the four teenagers.

"If mommy and daddy are ready to listen, I already know what – how did you call it? Oh, yes – Pucklebaby is".

Rachel and Puck stop bickering immediately, turning excited and expectant eyes to the smiling doctor. From the corner of her eye, Eloise sees Brittany and Santana lean forward, pinkies entwined, and it warms her heart. It's so rare to see a pregnant teenager with such a strong support system, especially when support pours out from other teenagers.

"Well?" Rachel says, squeezing Noah's hand every now and then. Eloise leans back and her smile blooms into a grin.

"Congratulations, Noah, Rachel, it's a boy".


	10. 9

**Author's Note: **I am so sorry for the very long absence of updates lately. It has been so hard to actually stop and write, for I have been busy studying for my bar exam (I don't even have time to stop and find inspiration to write, it's like _that_ busy).

Also, never thought I'd try this, but since I all but read every completed fiction of Puckleberry there is in their archive and still haven't found what I'm looking for, I have to try out this.

So, I'm looking for a story. It's a Puckleberry. Instead of going to juvie, Noah goes to prison for a year and Rachel goes visit him. They begin a relationship while he's behind bars, and she even dresses sexier than normal to kick his rep up while he's incarcerated. They have private visitations and once he's done with his time, when he walks out, she's out there waiting for him. If my memory doesn't fail me, by the end he thinks he'll always have that year in his record, but he'll be fine as long as he has her.

**Disclaimer: **No, RM, the Insane, hasn't adopted me yet. Not even close.

**To Be a Father**

_**Nine**_

**A** boy.

She's having a son.

Tears pool and run down Rachel's cheeks as her mind replays Eloise's words, her eyes glued to the black and white grainy blob onscreen. A beautiful, healthy little boy is growing inside of her, a son to love and care and sing lullabies to. A boy to teach how to properly treat a lady, how not to be like her exes – apart from Noah, that is – and not to make a woman fall in love with them only to break her heart down the road.

Noah's hands squeeze her and she looks away from the screen to see a proud big smile on his lips. A boy! He's having a son! This piece of news has him breathless with joy, as he shares a big wide grin with Rachel, Brittany squealing and cheering behind them as she and Santana start planning for baby shopping trips and names and every other stuff that revolves around their little boy. Eloise is sitting behind Rachel, smiling as she finishes the checkup on baby boy Puckerman, and she hands Rachel a tissue. "We're done here", she says as she clicks some buttons and the printer attached to the machine hums to life. "Congratulations again, Noah, Rachel, on your son".

"Thank you", Rachel says sincerely as she sits down on the cot and wipes her stomach clean of the gooey, transparent gel. The slightly older woman smiles back and nods, walking back into the adjoining office and leaving the four teenagers alone in the exam room. As soon as she has her back turned, Eloise hears the scraping sound of the chairs being moved, and the muffled laughter from Rachel as the two cheerleaders tackle her into a hug. Chuckling, the doctor shakes her head slowly and closes the door behind her.

"You're having a baby boy!" Brittany squeals as she hugs Rachel tight and jumps up and down with her, a big brilliant grin on her pretty face. Rachel laughs and nods.

"Yeah, I am", she says softly, getting up as she fixes her scrub. "I'm gonna go get changed, okay? I won't take long", she tells Noah quietly, placing a gentle hand on his cheek and softly caressing the warm skin. He smiles back, nodding at her, and presses a sweet kiss against the silky skin of her palm, heart thundering at the blush that blooms on her cheeks.

She rushes out, leaving Brittany, Noah and Santana behind, and as soon as the washroom door closes after her, the Latina gets up from her seat and walks towards him, who's leaning against the cot, a foolish grin on his lips as his eyes remained glued to the piece of wood that kept him from his new baby mama.

"So… When you're gonna stake your claim?" The taller brunette asks quietly, a small smirk curving her lips as she notices him startle and then look – better yet, _glare_ at her through narrowed eyes. "C'mon, Puck, you don't really think you're managing to hide it, do you?" After a moment, she chuckles. "Oh, _Dios_, you do! Babe, I'm sorry, but you have pussy whipped tattooed on that forehead of yours", she teases, chuckling at his huff.

"I don't have a claim to _stake_, Satan", he mutters, fists clenching slightly. "I'm helping Berry raise the baby inside her but that's it. Who knows, maybe St. Jerk will wake up one day and decide he wants to be a father to their boy after all?" He spits bitterly, back turned to the door behind which Rachel is.

"Puck…" Santana says slowly, her voice warning.

"Where's the party tonight?" Maybe it's his mind playing tricks on him, but why is Santana looking murderous.

"Puck", Brittany tries, her eyes wide and worried.

"Maybe I'll call Lacey. She definitely knows, and she's been wanting to take a ride on the Puckerone express for a while now", he says as he turns to the door – and then his heart stops.

Hazel eyes lock with tearful brown pools and his mouth turns into sandpaper. Rachel, a thick sheen of tears gathered in her eyelids, glares at him, betrayal sparkling in her eyes as she clutches her purse tighter to her body and angrily pushes past him, tears sliding down her cheeks as Brittany glares at Puck and shakes her head, negatively, quickly following after Rachel.

"Fuck!" He roars, rushing after both Rachel and Brittany.

**O**nce she's far away from the office, Rachel stops and leans against the nearest wall, trembling so much she barely drops her cell phone. Brittany finds her and, silently, wraps her arms around the pregnant brunette, Rachel's tearstained cheek coming to rest against Brittany's shoulder. "I thought…" She sobs, whispering throatily, "I thought he wanted to be with me and my son!"

"He does, Rach", Brittany whispers quietly, stroking her hair softly. "He's just being stupid and angry. He loves you both so much, and he knows he can't have you, because he thinks you still love Jesse".

"But I do love Jesse", Rachel argues, her voice quiet but vehement.

"Yeah, you do. But you're not _in love _with him anymore, are you?" Brittany shoots back quietly, nodding as Rachel stays silent, a small smile curving her lips. "Yeah, I thought so". She presses a tender kiss to Rachel's forehead and gives Rachel her cell phone. "You're gonna call Jesse?"

Rachel nods, wiping her eyes. "I need… I need _him_ right now. You know? He's my best friend".

Brittany nods, watching serenely as Rachel presses a button on her phone.

In LA, Jesse's heart races slightly as his phone plays _Hello_. Closing his book with a slam, he picks the phone, and he wants to answer it so badly… But he can't. He has to let Rachel go, he has to free Rachel from himself if he wants her to be truly happy with Puckerman and their baby. With a broken sigh, he refuses the call, turning the phone off and focusing back on his studies.

Back in Lima, Rachel cries softly as Jesse's voicemail picks the call up. Her heart hurting, she leans her face against Brittany's shoulder and cries. Slowly, the blonde takes the phone from her hand and wraps an arm around her shoulders. "It's for the best, Rach…" She says quietly. "You **have** to let go of him, sweetie".

"RACHEL!" Puck's voice booms from close to where they are, and Rachel's breath quickens as she presses herself closer to Brittany. Santana barges in where they are, her eyebrows lifting into her hairline as a small smirk curves her lips.

"Do I have to be jealous?" She asks Brittany with a teasing tone, Brittany giggling and shaking her head negatively as she accepts Santana's help to stand up and turns to help Rachel to stand up as well. Wrapping an arm around her blonde best friend, Santana turns concerned eyes to their pregnant companion. "You okay, Berry?"

Patting her clothes clean of any dirt, Rachel shrugs and offers Santana a weak smile. "I'll live".

"You want me to kick Puck's ass to you? He's just talking shit, you know".

Rachel chuckles dryly. "Do I?"

"Fuck, Berry, yes, he is. He's being a jerk, God knows why. I just told him he had to make a move before someone else did".

Rachel rolls her eyes, a loving hand coming to gently cup her slightly swollen stomach as she pointedly looks at Santana. The Latina shrugs and waves dismissively. "Details. If anyone can make a guy fall in love with her while being a bat crazy midget high on hormones, that's you. Not that you have to work hard for it, Puck's been ass over feet in love with you already".

Looking sharply up at her friend, Rachel feels her jaw dropping, eyes widening, mouth opening and closing as she stutters. Finally, after a few moments, she sputters, "Are you insane?"

Brittany is the one who rolls her eyes, looking patronizingly at her. "Rach, honestly. You think he has manned up and taken over being your baby daddy just because of your pretty eyes?"

"I… I don't know. I never actually stopped to think about why he offered, I just accepted it. It felt… I don't know", she shrugs helplessly. "Right, I think", she adds, fixing her purse in her shoulder as she marches towards the door, the two cheerios following after her.

But, before any of the two can reply and offer more insight, Noah shows up, eyes panicked, air visibly frazzled as he sweeps in and takes her in his arms, his face pressing against her hair as he kisses the fruity-scented mahogany locks. "Rach! I'm so sorry, I was being stupid and childish. Are you okay? Is our boy okay?" He kneels in front of her, his ear coming to rest against the small swell of her belly as he tries to listen to the baby inside her womb. "I'm so sorry, buddy. Can you forgive daddy for being stupid?" He then kisses her cotton-covered stomach and rests his chin against her bump, looking hopefully up at her.

The sweetness of the scene in front of her brings renewed tears to Rachel's eyes. Noah kneeling in front of her, kissing her belly, talking to her baby, calling himself 'daddy'… It's just too much for her emotions, which are, understandably, all over the place. _Maybe this is how a mood swing_ _feels like_, she muses as she impulsively tugs Noah up. Once he's standing straight, she slaps him, his cheek stinging as her palm connects with his cheek, Noah wobbling a little as he looks surprised at her. Behind her, Brittany gasps and Santana whistles appreciatively, mumbling 'You go, Berry'.

"Never, I mean it, _never_ again", she stresses emphatically, "say that I'm just taking my time with you until Jesse 'comes to his senses'. Jesse _doesn't _want me or the baby, Noah, and that's okay. I can live with that as long as I _know_ that you're here to make sure both I and my son are okay", she jabs her finger against his chest, moving so he has to take a step backwards. "I _know_ what I want, Noah! Do you?"

He keeps silent and it makes her furious. "Answer me! Do you know what _you_ want?"

Something explodes inside of him when she questions him. Eyes darkening dangerously, Puck places his hands on her expanding waistline and hauls her closer to him, his lips slanting possessively over hers in a bruising, demanding kiss. Once their mouths touch, fireworks explode inside them, and Rachel lifts her hand to Puck's neck, bringing him even closer, her short fingernails scratching the soft skin of his neck.

Once their need for air grows too great, Puck pulls back, dark green eyes locking with her deep brown ones. "I want you, Berry. Both of you".


	11. 10

**Author's Note: **No, it's not an illusion. I'm really updating twice a month. In honor of Glee's return, the new, very fluffy, very sugary chapter of _To Be a Father_.

**To Be a Father**

_Ten_

**H**is gruff, possessive answer brings a smile to Rachel's lips. Throwing her head back and laughing, she stands on her tiptoes to press another hard, demanding kiss to his smirking mouth. "You **have** me. You have **us**", she whispers, resting her forehead against his, her fingers running through his Mohawk down his neck and then back up. A small, blissful smile curves his lips, softening his features. It's the first time she sees this smile, this soft, contented curve of Noah's full pink lips. His large, warm hand comes to rest over her Navy-inspired flowing top, against the small swell of her bump, and he closes his eyes, a happy sigh escaping him.

"My family", he whispers at last, and the pregnant teen blinks back the happy tears that prickle at the back of her eyes. She closes her eyes and slides her arms down his sides, wrapping them around his waist and cuddling against his broad chest, eyes closed in peace for the first time in months, for the first time since the white plastic stick turned pink and sealed her fate.

Behind them, Brittany and Santana share an overjoyed smile.

* * *

**N**ow that they know what they're having – a son! – Noah and Rachel finally start planning. First, they tell Anne (Noah does the honors – "Woman, you're having your Jewish grandson. Fuck, ma, stop crying!"), Hiram and Leroy ("Noah and I are thrilled to announce that at long last you'll have a baby boy to carry on the family name". "What are you talking about, Berry, that kid's a Puckerman". "Don't be stupid, Noah, of course his last name is Berry-Puckerman"). The grandparents' reactions are pretty much the same (Anne cries and says thankful prayers in Hebrew; the Berry men cry and smile until Noah thinks their cheeks will crack from the effort), and together, as a family, the three adults and two teens start working out the details of the living arrangements for the young family.

Next they start telling the few friends they know have their backs. Being with them on their appointment, Brittany and Santana already know, of course. Mike and Matt start talking about everything they're going to teach Pucklebaby (Brit's special nickname for their son): football, basketball, baseball, dance, pop and lock, video games. Puck and Rachel watch as their four friends all but forget they're on the room, planning everything from name to nursery to godparents. The couple shakes their heads in amusement, relief etched in their eyes for their friends' unwavering support.

Telling Quinn is slightly more awkward. At first, Rachel seriously considered the option of being the one to share with the mother of Noah's first daughter the gender of her child, but after two long, quiet days of reflection she approaches her new boyfriend (just thinking the words make her giddy) and asks him to tell the former head cheerleader they're having a son.

"Do we really need to?" He grumbles, clearly against the idea.

"Noah…" She sighs. "You know they'll ask. I'll be huge by the time we go back to school. Or your mother will pay for it to be on the paper", he barks out a laugh and she giggles. "It won't be bad. I'm sure she'll be relieved we're not having a girl. Our son won't steal Beth's place".

"He sure as hell won't", he replies, quietly, voice strained but firm. Talking about the little girl her mother was raising two towns over was still a sore spot for him, she knows that – so she comfortingly rubs her hand along his spine, trying to soothe him. Rachel lovingly kisses his cheek, eyes closed as her forehead presses against his temple, and a sigh escapes him. "Okay, I'll do it".

The bright, thankful smile that appears in her face makes it worth it.

That's why, two days later, he finds himself nervously knocking on the front door of the new residence of the Fabray women. Noah anxiously tugs at his shirt's collar, waiting for someone to open the door, anyone, and fighting off the urge to get the fuck away from that house.

But Rachel has a point, he knows that (as hard as it is for him to admit it). Quinn deserves to know before everyone else from school about the baby. Their son. A boy. A child he'll raise, care and love. For him it doesn't matter that some other man put that baby inside of Rachel's belly. If there was anything his deadbeat of a father taught him, it's that conceiving a child with a woman doesn't make a father out of a man.

His musings are interrupted by the clicking of the door being pulled open, and he comes face to face with the clear, guarded blue eyes and Judy Fabray. "Noah", she greets him politely with a nod. "How can I help you?"

"Mrs. Fabray, I'm sorry to bother you… But is Quinn home? I really need to talk to her".

A flash of surprise appears in Judy's eyes, before she nods and steps back, allowing him entrance to her house. "She's upstairs. Please take a seat, I'll be right back".

"Thank you", he replies as he walks to the small living room, coming to stand by a window. Puck feels too anxious to sit still, taking deep, cleansing breaths to keep his nerves steady. _I'm a fucking BAMF. Why the hell am I so nervous? I'm not a goddamn pussy!_

He's startled out of his thoughts by the sound of steps coming down the stairs, and seconds later Quinn appears on the living room, her forehead wrinkled in a frown. "Puck? Mom said you wanted to talk me… Is there something wrong? Is it Rachel?"

He gapes at her for a moment, before straightening his shoulders and looking at her. "Nothing is wrong, Q, I'm sorry if I made you and your ma think that. And Rachel's great".

"Good", Quinn says hesitantly, after a beat. "I'm glad. And… and the baby?" She asks after another moment, even more careful.

"The baby is awesome. Growing up nice and strong", he says sincerely, with a pang in his heart as he notices the flash of pain in her eyes. "Uh… That's why I came here. To talk to you. About the baby".

Quinn's eyebrows shoot up to her hairline, a puzzled expression settling on her pretty face. "You wanted to talk to **me** about your new baby?" She repeats, incredulous.

Puck nods. "Rachel wanted to do it, but she didn't want to make you uncomfortable", he explains, biting back a wry chuckle at the surprise in Quinn's pale face.

"O… kay…" Quinn says, confused, as she takes a seat on the family couch. Splaying the soft fabric of her flowing skirt around herself, she eagerly looks up at her former flame. "So? What is it that you and Rachel have to tell me about your baby?"

Nervous, the tackle begins to pace in front of his former baby mama, trying to calm himself down a little. Taking one last, fortifying breath, he turns to her and blurts out, "Rachel and I are having a son".

"Oh!" Quinn gasps out in shock. "I… I see", she stutters, a glimmer of relief in her eyes. "Not… not a daughter then?" She repeats carefully, her tone casual but her posture anything but.

"No. Not another daughter", he states, looking sightlessly out of the window. He sees Quinn flinch by the corner of his eye and sighs. "Q, look, you can try and pretend Beth never happened, but I can't. No matter what went down between you and me, I was fucking ready to be an awesome daddy to that baby. You couldn't see that and it's okay now, I get it". He makes a pause and adds, "Rachel was worried you'd think being a daddy to her baby meant I'd forget Beth. I thought she was making a storm out of nothing but I can see she was right, damn her", he chuckles, then grows serious. "Nothing, and I mean **nothing** will make me forget that little girl, Q".

"You're not really her baby daddy, you know that, right?" She states carefully. A blank look falls over his face before he lifts an eyebrow.

"Shelby not having given birth to Beth makes her any less her mom?" He shoots back, sighing again when he notices how she flinches. "Listen, Q. Jesse doesn't want his son with Rachel. I mean, he'd want him if they'd made him like years from now, when both he and Rachel had made their dreams come true. He doesn't want to be a father now. I do. I am ready. I love that baby more than anything in the world, he's as mine as Beth is".

Quinn nods and, after a terse moment of silence, says quietly, "Puck, I'm sorry".

He looks surprised at her. "What for?"

"For the way I've treated you during… everything. You were nothing but supportive of me and I failed to see how much Beth meant to you".

He cuts her off with a wave of his hand. "That's cool, Q. I could've fought with you for all the decisions you made that concerned Beth, if I really wanted to. I could've told Finn I was the dad. I could've gone against Shelby's wish to adopt Beth. But you know what? We made the best decision we could for her. Shelby will raise her right".

"You… you really think that?" She whispers, and he nods. "But… But what if someday she decides she doesn't want anything to do with her, like she did with Rachel?"

Puck worries his lower lip for a moment before saying carefully, "I think it's different. With Rachel, I mean. She only saw Rach when Rach was no older than Beth was, and that's the image she kept of her – her precious, helpless, dependent baby girl. When she came face to face with the reality of Rachel – that strong, fierce, independent girl we all know and love – she couldn't deal. So she's having the chance to do with Beth everything she never got to do to Rachel".

"You have quite the insight on her mind", Quinn says, surprise coloring her tone. Puck shrugs.

"Rach and I have talked quite a lot about the Shelby situation. She was incredibly hurt by everything".

Quinn nods. "It has been… quite the few months for her".

"Yeah", Puck breathes. They stay silent for a moment, and then he steps away from the window. "I'm… I'm gonna go".

"Okay", Quinn says, rising from the couch. She follows him as he walks towards the door. Once he's outside on the porch, she leans against the door, a small smile on her lips. "Puck?"

"Yeah?" He calls back, turning to look at her.

"Congratulations. You're going to be a great dad", she says sincerely. He gives her a small smile before hopping into his truck and driving away.

"Quinnie?" Judy Fabray appears behind her daughter. "Are you okay, dear?"

"You know what, mom?" She replies as she closes the door behind her, a peaceful smile lighting up her features. "I think I really am".

* * *

**T**he first issue the parents-to-be decide to discuss with their own parents is: where are they going to live once their baby is born? The Berry residence is quite large and comfortable, but not for two couples plus a baby. Hiram and Leroy seem quite adamant to have their daughter and grandson with them, but after a long, tiring debate, Puck agrees with Rachel. If they move in, all of them will lose their privacy, so staying at the Berry house is a no.

Moving in with the Puckerman women is also out of the cards, but because of the space issue. Anne Puckerman is as insistent to have her son and his family live with her as the Berry men were, but Puck states (and Rachel agrees) that, if they move in, his mom's house will be "fucking cramped". ("Noah! Language!" Rachel shrieks in reply).

In the end, Anne makes the winning suggestion. Behind the Puckerman house, within the property but not close to the main building, there is a second, smaller house with a suite and an extra room that Noah's father Aaron used to use as a studio, the suite being used as a workout room. Nowadays, the extra space is being used for storage, but, Anne's very quick to point out, "it won't take much for us to clean everything up. This way you two can have your privacy, but still stay close enough for us to help if anything happens that you can't deal with".

At first, Puck is admittedly hesitant to stay within walking distance of his mother. Why? Have you met his mother? The woman all but has the baby's name chosen ("Fuck, ma, I'm not naming him Aaron!" "Noah! Language!" "Sorry, babe, but my kid's not having that deadbeat's name!"), and the due date is far, far, **far **away (it's only August, and the baby isn't due for another six months give or take).

But then Rachel pulls him aside one evening, and quietly hisses at him how she has no experience **whatsoever** in caring for a child. At first, Puck is dismissive of her concerns, reminding her how he helped raise Nina. But then, of course, Rachel has to break through his (winning) arguments. "Noah, I **never** had a mother. And this is my first child. The first months of his life are going to be probably the hardest, and you won't be around every single second of every single day. Please. Let's live here".

(He gives in. How can he deny her anything when she's speaking all soft and vulnerable, and her eyes are so big and pleading? Fuck you if you think you could deny your pregnant baby mama anything that will make her happy).


	12. 11

**Author's Note: **First and foremost, I apologize greatly for my long delay in updating this baby. Life has been hectic for me and I've recently learned it's about to get even busier, but I can honestly say I can't wait. Plus, I've never wrote any character as douchey as I just wrote Finn Hudson and it was extremely hard for me to do so. I hate Finn, but even I had to take breathers every now and then as I wrote Finn's scenes in this chapter. I apologize in advance if it sucks.

**To Be a Father**

_Eleven_

**I**t's the middle of August, when Rachel sees Finn for the first time since the day she disastrously told him (and the rest of New Directions) that she was having Noah's baby. She's with Noah's younger sister Nina in the living room, the two girls going through the pile of baby stuff Rachel and Noah's son has been gifted with from everyone from Anne to Santana, Brittany and, shock of the shocks, Kurt, Mercedes and Tina. Rachel's fellow divas and New Directions' resident goth showed up in front of the Berry residence, piled up with baby shops' bags and a nervous apologies on their lips, a few days after Brittany and Santana activated the glee phone tree and spread the word that Pucklebaby was a boy. Rachel, hormonally imbalanced girl that she is, burst into tears when her three teammates (now former, since she's still refusing to go back to ND once the new school term starts) walked through her fathers' door and showed everything they had bought for her son.

Having been decided, after a long conversation with the expectant parents and the future grandparents, that it would be best for Noah and Rachel if they were already settled in their new home once Pucklebaby boy arrived, Rachel had gracefully bowed out of an afternoon of hanging out with Quinn, Brittany and Santana in Matthew's house while Matthew himself, Noah and Michael had their boys afternoon of Halo marathon, telling Noah that she needed to start cleaning their tiny house. Noah had at first insisted with her to go, but then, surrendering, told her not to strain herself with cleaning.

Rachel is sitting on the living room floor with Nina, Anne's muffled voice coming from the kitchen as she, in a rare day off, sings along to an old rock station while preparing a light snack for the three of them, Rachel humming along as well and Nina every now and then pitching in too. There's a knock on the front door and, before either of the two girls can move, Anne calls out, "I'll answer!". Rachel looks curiously at Nina, who shrugs, cooing adoringly at a small, red- and white-striped onesie, a gift, if memory serves Rachel well, from Quinn.

Anne's voice is barely audible and muffled, but pleased, from the foyer, but Rachel frowns when she hears a second female voice. Steps sound from the foyer towards the living room, and Rachel quickly tells Nina to start gathering the baby stuff so they can make space for Anne to receive their guest. Soon the voices become clearer as they approach the room, and a happy smile curves Rachel's lips as she recognizes Carole Hudson's voice. She turns to greet the older woman, rising from the floor, patting her flowery summer dress clean...

… And freezes. Carole isn't alone with Anne. Finn, visibly sullen, is trailing right behind the two women.

"... And of course, you remember Noah's girlfriend Rachel", Anne says as they walk in the room. A small smile curves Carole's lips as she nods at Rachel, greeting her gently, the pregnant teenager noticing her visible effort not to allow her eyes to wander down to where Rachel's tiny baby bump is poking out from underneath her dress. Rachel's stomach clenches as Finn fails to have his mother's kindness and downright glares at the visible proof of Rachel's pregnancy. The brunette's hand comes unconsciously to rest over her swollen stomach, and she takes a deep breath, affixing a brilliant show face.

"Good afternoon, Mrs. Hudson", Rachel greets the other woman, hoping she and Anne won't notice the hysterical edge in her voice. (She doesn't want another scene with Finn to play out in the Puckerman's house. It won't do any of them any good, and it'd just piss Noah off even further with Finn).

"Call me Carole, dear. Good afternoon. How are you?"

"We're fine", Rachel replies automatically, her hand rubbing the curve of her belly lovingly. "I'd love to stay and talk, but I fear I have to have a glass of water and then go outside to clean everything up, Mrs. Puckerman", she's blatantly ignoring Finn, and Nina's completely bewildered. Carole looks slightly puzzled, but Anne just smiles at her grandson's mother and nods (Noah's told her of Finn's over the top reaction to Rachel's baby news).

"That's fine, dear. Take a pitcher of water with you, it's too hot outside and I don't want Noah yelling at me if anything happens to you or my grandson. Nina, you go outside as well and help Rachel, okay, sweetie?"

"Okay, mama", Nina nods with a smile, trailing after Rachel who's walking towards the kitchen to pick up the pitcher Anne suggested. The young girl frowns as Rachel, sighing, leans her forehead against the pristine white door of their fridge, eyes closed and chest heaving. "Rachel?" Nina asks quietly, approaching her. "Are you okay?" She asks, concern weighing in her sweet voice. Rachel, with her eyes still closed, smiles slightly and looks towards Noah's young sister.

"Yeah, _Rachel_", the voice that comes from the kitchen door is full of venom. "Are you okay?" The two girls look towards the doorway, and Finn's standing there, a sneer in his face, his voice full of mockery. Rachel tenses up next to Nina and drapes an arm over the small swell of her stomach, the movement attracting Finn's eyes to that part of her body. "Well, well, well", he says, maliciously, and Rachel braces herself for something. What, she doesn't know yet. "You're huge! Man, you really were cheating on St. James with Puck, weren't you?" He spits, and Rachel's frozen. Nina is completely shocked at Finn's attitude and Finn's words and Finn's tone. She can barely recognize him, and that **is **something, given that from early age Nina always held her **two** older brothers over the head of those pesky boys who kept nagging her.

"That must be why he cracked that egg on your head", Finn carries only, his voice mercilessly taunting. "He was done being the poor jerk whose slut of a girlfriend couldn't keep her legs closed. What did you do to pull him over the edge, tried to pass up the baby as his? Of course you did".

"FINN!" Nina screams in shock, but other four outraged female voices say at the same time. He stiffens up and turns around, his face going deadly pale as his eyes lock with Carole's astonished face. Anne's front of her old friend, a glare in her eyes. He turns to the back door and there stand Quinn and Brittany, the former cheerio looking outraged, and the taller blonde as shocked as his mother. He feels a tap on his shoulder and turns around – and a fist slams on his nose.

"Fuck!" He cries out, the curse sliding off his tongue and mixing with the high-pitched screams of the females in the room. The quarterback falls to the floor with a loud thud, and then a squealing scream leaves his lips as a foot connects with his groin, fiery pain shooting up from the injured spot as he twists and turns, his hand coming to cup the burning place. A string of Spanish curses being muttered in a female voice cuts through the fog of pain, and Finn blinks through his tears to see Quinn and Brittany pulling away a visibly struggling Santana. Puck's standing over him, a dark glower in his handsome face.

"Listen up, asshole", Puck growls as he fists the fabric of Finn's shirt and pulls his former buddy so close that Finn can almost count the flecks of golden inside the stormy hazel pools. "Next time you so much breaths next to my girlfriend and my baby, I swear to God I'll kill you. You're being a jealous prick, but, apart from that, you're being just fucking downright cruel". He hauls the taller boy up and starts dragging him out of the house, when a small whisper roots him to his place, Finn with a hand cupping his dripping nose and Carole quietly apologizing to Anne.

"Noah", Rachel whispers, before she faints with a soft thud in the middle of the kitchen. Nina, Quinn and Brittany scream while Noah, perplexed, shoves Finn away so hard that the quarterback slams against the wall and falls to the floor, dizzily watching as his former best friend breaks through the protective and concerned circle the women and child have built around Rachel. Being more experienced since she works as a nurse at the maternity ward of the Lima County General, Anne gently cradles Rachel's head on her lap and searched for her pulse, tension dripping from every feature of her face.

"Oh, thank Lord", Anne breathes as she looks comfortingly at her son. "She's fine. Her heartbeats are strong and steady. I think it was all the stress she went under today", everyone in the room glares at the fallen boy, who humphs angrily and looks away. "Let's just take her upstairs and let her rest and I'm sure-"

But Quinn interrupts Anne; her voice is trembling and her finger's shaking as she points to the bottom of Rachel's white shorts. "Mrs. Puckerman..." She whispers; her tone is full of fear. "... She's bleeding".

Anne gasps and pales; Quinn's eyes fill with tears, Carole begins praying quietly. "Noah", Anne orders, her voice all professional while her eyes flash with concern and worry, "call 911. We need to take her to the hospital immediately".

* * *

**N**oah is too scared to ride with a still-unconscious Rachel to the hospital in the ambulance, so Mrs. Puckerman is the one who goes with the mother of her unborn grandson. Carole drops Finn off at their home and then goes over to Lima County General; Quinn, Santana and Brittany force an apparently catatonic Puck in the Latina's car and drive over there breaking apparently all the traffic laws there are. During the short ride, Quinn activates the glee phone tree, calling Mercedes and telling her what happened. Mercedes gasps in shock and promises Quinn she'll warn everyone else.

Puck is quiet during the entire drive. Brittany is sobbing against his shoulder, practically curled up in his lap. He has his forehead pressed against the glass of the back window, an arm around Brittany's shoulders, rubbing them absently in something remotely similar to a comforting way. Santana's hands shake when she's not clenching the wheel so tight that her knuckles turn white, and she's quietly speaking in Spanish, curses mingled with prayers as she every now and then rubs her fingers against her eyes. Sitting shotgun, Quinn is most likely the most focused of the four of them, but even she's deeply disturbed; her phone falls often from her hands, and she has to take deep, steadying breaths when it starts blowing up with calls.

When they get there, Carole is sitting on the waiting room, eyes closed, lips moving but no sound coming out. Quinn takes a nearly hysterical Brittany to sit down, sitting her down before putting her phone in vibrate, while Santana wraps her arm around Noah's and hauls him to the front desk. "Rachel Berry", she barks to the older woman sitting behind, a bored look on her face while she lazily files her nails.

"Are you family?" The woman asks arrogantly. "If you're not family then you have to sit down and wait".

"Listen, _puta_", Santana can feel what she still has of her self-control basically vanishing in thin air, "my friend and his girlfriend", she points to Puck, who's still frighteningly quiet, "is somewhere in this stupid hospital, most likely losing their baby. Do you know who you're talking to? I'm-"

"Santana?" A male voice interrupts, and Santana feels a rush of relief as she turns to face the newcomer. A Latin man in his mid-forties, wearing denim and a light green shirt, is frowning as he approaches her. "What are you doing here, _hija_? Is there anything wrong?"

"_Papi_", Santana lets go of Puck and rushes into her father's arms, clinging at him desperately as she allows her panic and her worry to crash down on her. When everything went down, first with Finn, then with Rachel fainting, then with the notice that she was bleeding (when she clearly wasn't supposed to), Santana could see Puck shutting down from shock and fear, and she manned up. She pushed everyone out of the door, barking to Quinn to take care of a weepy Brittany while she herself dealt with Puckerman. But now that her _papi_'s here, she can let herself go and be afraid for the very first time.

"What's happening, baby?" Juan Lopez asks his older daughter, rubbing his hand comfortingly on her back.

"It's my friend Rachel, _papi_", Santana whispers, her voice thick with tears and muffled since her face's pressed against her father's chest. "She's pregnant, but she fainted, and she was bleeding, and that... that... that _puta_", she basically growls the word out, gesturing at the front desk, "was being all, 'You're not family, so sit the fuck down and wait'".

"Santana..." Dr. Lopez sighs, exasperated. "I'm sure Susan said none of that. However", he speaks when he feels Santana clearly gearing up to fight him on his words, "you said your friend is here somewhere being treated for a bleeding since she's pregnant?" He pats her hair affectionately. "_Tu eres una buena nena, mi hija_", he says, kissing the crown of her head. "Do you want me to find out how your friend is doing?"

"Please, daddy", Santana whispers, and Dr. Lopez nods as he gently leads her to a seat next to where Brittany's trying really hard to stop wailing, her face pressed in Quinn's shoulder and her own shoulders shaking as the muffled sound of sobbing escapes her. Quinn carefully passes Brittany to Santana's more than competent care and goes to where Puck stands, still petrified in shock, tears bubbling in his eyes. She silently leads him to the same row of seats and sits him down on a chair, taking the chair next to him and giving him her hand to hold. Dr. Lopez talks for a few moments with the front desk woman, who says something to him that makes him nod, and vanishes within the bustling ER.

A few moments later, the gleeks start pouring in. Mike and Matt are the first to arrive, frantically asking for news of Rachel and Pucklebaby. They take a look at the cuddling cheerleaders and take over the comforting role; Matt takes Santana outside so she can cry, rant and vent in peace and without the risk of being thrown out of the ER; Mike just sits in the chair Santana has just vacated and allows Brittany to sniffle quietly on his shoulder.

Kurt, Mercedes, Artie and Tina arrive next, Kurt looking surprisingly disheveled and concerned. The fashionista asks Quinn how Rachel's doing, and his question apparently knocks Puck back in the game, because he stares disdainfully at their teammate, a dark glower in his face. "And why do you fucking wanna know, Hummel? So you can spread around the word that Rachel fucking lost our baby?" He turns to Quinn and says, "Don't tell them a damn word, Fabray, or I swear to God, I won't be responsible for what I'll do".

"Puck?" Dr. Lopez approaches the group, and Puck stiffens in worry, panicked eyes staring at the older man. "I have news about your girlfriend and your baby..."


	13. 12

**Author's Note: **Darlings, I apologize for the cliffhanger. Since I don't want my inbox exploding with more panicked reviews (also, I don't want to keep you in suspense that much), here you have a new chapter!

**To Be a Father**

_Twelve_

**S**ilence falls over the teenagers as Dr. Lopez focuses on Puck, and Puck only. Brittany's clutching Mike's hand pretty tight, tears cascading down her cheeks. Artie stops rolling back and forth (his way of pacing) and fixes Santana's dad with a icy blue stare. Tina bites the corner of her nail, anxiety clear in her pretty face. Mike shoots a text to Matt, who in a matter of seconds bursts through the door hot in Santana's heels. Kurt and Mercedes, who have been silently seated on a corner, look up from their phones.

"_Papi_?" Santana asks quietly, coming to stand near Puck. Quinn does the same, with Matt taking up the spot behind the Latina, an arm around her waist and his free hand firm on Puck's shoulder. Brittany and Mike join them, and it's like they're all holding their collective breathe – even Carole who's looking surprisingly anxious from her seat nearby. Dr. Lopez looks around at the young faces, noticing the tension in Puck's shoulders, Brittany's wet cheeks, Santana's puffy eyes (he always knew his little girl had a soft spot for her glee mate). When a smile breaks out in his handsome face, the twelve people assembled in the waiting room feel a spark of hope that blooms in the wake of his following words.

"They're perfectly fine and healthy, son. It was just a scare. She woke up as soon as they started working on her and told us she went under a great deal of stress today, so her body reacted to it. She's fine and the baby is in top condition". Cheers and prayers start ringing out from everywhere, Puck sagging in relief on the chair, his eyes closed and his upper body leaning forward so his face is pressed in his hand. "She's asking for you, so, if you follow me...?"

"Fuck yeah", Puck rasps out, scrambling to his feet. The other teenagers trail after them, relief clear in their faces, the weight of Dr. Lopez's words crashing on Quinn as she finally allows her emotions to take over, taking a moment to stay behind and weep in relief. Carole, with surprising gentleness, tenderly leads her back to the waiting room, murmuring soft words of comfort to the sobbing blonde.

When they arrive at Rachel's room, Anne Puckerman is walking off, a relieved smile on her face. She hugs her son tightly when she sees him, and Tina, Artie, Kurt and Mercedes are shocked to see McKinley's resident badass cling to his mother as tightly as she is hugging him. "They're okay, baby", they hear Anne Puckerman whisper, her face pressed on her son's Mohawk. "They're okay." The older woman's wiping her eyes as she lets go of her son, a small smile on her face as she pushes him in. "Now go on, she's a little sleepy, but that's because of the medication we put her on in order to stop the bleeding".

Puck wipes his eyes as his mother lets go of him, his posture relaxed for the first time in hours. Rachel's lying on the hospital bed, looking childishly small on the big bed. Her raven hair is spread around the pillow like dark silk, the white hospital scrubs making her seem even paler. But she brightens up a little when she sees Puck, and holds out her hand to him, a weak smile curving her lips. "Hey, baby", they hear Puck whisper, and Rachel hums in response. Puck sits down on the chair next to the bed, holding Rachel's hand tightly, the other spread possessively over her tiny, tiny stomach – and begins crying earnestly.

"Oh, Noah..." Rachel breathes, and Santana turns to the other gleeks, a scowl in her face.

"The show's over. Move your asses, bitches, give Puck and B their privacy", she orders, pulling the door a little closed. She's about to push Kurt and Mercedes away, when Quinn appears from the waiting room, Carole by her side, her face still sticky from her tears and her eyes red, but looking somewhat composed.

"No", Quinn tells Santana, with a nod in Kurt and Mercedes' direction. "Let them stay. Let them **see**. Maybe this way they'll get off their high horse", she spits in their direction, and it's with a sense of smug satisfaction that Matt, Brittany, Mike, Quinn and Santana see the two gossip queens of New Directions flinch.

"C'mon, let's go to the cafeteria", Anne Puckerman suggests. "We all need a strong cup of coffee and maybe even a hot meal. It's been quite the eventful day". Agreeing noises come from the teenagers, who follow her to the elevator, leaving only the stunned Kurt and Mercedes behind.

* * *

**R**achel begins tearing up the moment she first hears Noah's sobs. "Noah, don't cry, baby", she whispers, pulling him so he's lying in the bed with her. He lies so that he has his arms around her waist and his cheek pressed to her stomach, and she can feel the wet spot on the level of her belly increasing in size. She runs her fingers through his hair, while the other hand tries unsuccessfully to wipe her tears away. "I'm okay, he's okay... Don't cry, Noah, please".

"I don't want to lose you guys", Noah whispers, his voice rough with his tears. "Ever. Just the idea of not having him in my life... Not having **you**... Fuck, babe, it froze me. Satan and Q had to take care of everything, because I was too fucking scared to do anything".

"Oh, Noah..." Rachel sobs once, her tear-streaked face glinting in the indirect light of the hospital room. "No, don't think that. We're here. I am here and so is he. We're **never** leaving, I promise".

Noah snorts. "You can't promise me that? What if something happens and takes you two away? What if **someone** happens and wants to take you away?"

But Rachel shakes her head negatively. "Never. Never, Noah. Choices have been made in the last few months, and they can't be unmade". She's aware of Kurt and Mercedes being there, and she knows so is he – that's why they're both being extremely careful with their words, but she knows he understands the underlining meaning. She entwines her fingers with his and brings one of his hands up so she can kiss his knuckles gently. "I chose to have this baby with you, and yes, it has been quite a struggle, because our son is making me rethink all my life plan – but at the same time, it's been so **worth **it. Noah, I'll never regret my choice. Never".

He sits up straighter, kissing her gently, his fingers tangling in her soft hair. Her hand leaves his hair to cradle his cheek, her fingers caressing the tear-sticky skin lightly as she kisses him back. His free hand comes to rest on her stomach, and she puts her hand over his, smiling slightly as he feels the fetal heart monitor attached to her stomach and pulls away, frowning. He looks curiously at her, and she looks at the offending machine, which is beeping steadily but quietly. "See?" She asks him quietly. "He's okay", she pecks at his lips quickly, biting his lower lip tenderly.

"Thank God", Noah mumbles. "Otherwise it'd be another reason for me to kill Hudson", he mutters, and Rachel shudders.

"Noah, please, let go", she asks him, but he shakes his head.

"I can't, sorry, baby. He's the reason you're here. If he didn't barge into our house to call you a slut and spread lies about you and St. James, you wouldn't have felt ill and nothing would have happened".

The young couple hears the shocked gasps of their fellow teammates, but ignore them. "Noah, you know I condone violence. I don't want you to be hurt".

He chuckles. "I won't be hurt, babe. I promise. But I can't make you any promises concerning Hudson's safety".

Rachel sighs, knowing she won't manage to convince him otherwise, and doesn't insist. She rests her forehead against his, her eyes closed. "I love you, Noah". He gasps, his eyes flying open, shock clear in his face as he looks at her. She shyly bites her lower lip, her hands cradling his face again as she looks straight in his eyes. "I do. I know we've not been together long, but I love you, so much. But especially for our baby".

"Oh, babe..." He kisses her a little more forcefully, his arms wrapped around her petite body. Exchanging a meaningful and slightly guilty glance, Kurt and Mercedes leave the room, quietly closing the door behind them.

* * *

**O**nce they're left alone – at last – Rachel wipes the remains of Puck's tears away and kisses him gently. "Noah?" She whispers quietly, her forehead pressed against his. He hums in response, so she carries on, "Can you please give me your phone? We have to make a call". He looks at her inquisitively, and she sighs. "Jesse. Noah, I know you're the daddy, but... It feels wrong to go under this and not tell him, you know?" She makes a pause, and then adds quietly, "He doesn't want to be a father to my baby, that's fine. You're being awesome in that and I'm more than happy with you. But I want him in my life as my friend. Who knows, maybe one day we'll be costars in the same musical, and I don't want to be uncomfortable. He was a part of my life once – someone I loved, but that I don't anymore. Please?"

He has to hand it to her – girl knows how to talk her way in, and out, of anything. Sighing, he nods as he hands her his phone. "Go make your calls, babe. But put it in speakerphone, okay? He'll answer since it's my number". Rachel looks at him funny and he sighs, scratching the back of his neck. "I, uh, I've been keeping him updated on your health, and the baby. He calls every couple of weeks. He cares, Rachel. He doesn't want to be in your life, and the baby's life, but he wonders how I'm treating the two of you. So I call. And he answers. I know he doesn't pick your calls up, but he'll answer it if he thinks it's me calling".

She has tears in her eyes but a smile on her lips as she kisses him, pressing Jesse's number in the keypad. The phone rings only twice, Jesse's alarmed voice filling her ears. "Puckerman, what's up? You never call two weeks on a row. Is everything alright?"

"Jess", she whispers, the nickname escaping her easily. She can almost hear his breath catching, and she shudders for a moment, searching blindly for Puck's hand, who holds her gently. She shoots him a thankful smile.

"Hey, Rach", Jesse breathes out, turning off his stereo. "Long time no talk. How are you?"

"I'm fine now", she replies truthfully. "I'm at the hospital".

Jesse sits straighter in his bed, gasping, alarm shooting throughout his body. "Hospital? Is there anything wrong with you, Rach?"

"Nothing too serious, I promise. I, uh, I had a bleeding earlier today. But I'm fine. So is the baby. We're both okay".

"I'm glad to hear that. Can you give the phone to Puckerman, please?" He asks gently, a touch of fondness in his voice. She looks confused at Puck, but passes him the phone. "Puckerman. What the fuck happened?"

"Hudson", Puck replies coldly. Rachel squeezes his hand softly, feeling the way he tenses up, anger exuding off his body. "He came over my house today with his mom and you know how he lacks a brain-to-mouth filter when he's pissed off. He started sprouting all this bullshit on how Rachel's a slut for cheating on you with me".

"That asshole", Jesse bites out, and Puck nods even though the older boy can't see him.

"Word, man. He'd spoken a handful of bullshit before I got home and shut him the fuck up, so damage was fucking done by the time I decked him nice and easy. Dude never learnt to punch with both hands, his fucking loss", he smirks, and Rachel giggles as she swats his shoulder, Jesse laughing in his ear.

Jesse's quiet for a moment, then asks quietly, "Seriously, Puck. How are they doing?"

"They're fine, man. Relax. I take good care of my family".

In his UCLA dorm, Jesse smiles fondly. "That you do, that you do, man". There's a moment of silence, and then the former lead of Vocal Adrenaline speaks again. "Can you give the phone back to Rachel?"

"Sure", Puck hands Rachel back the phone, and she cuddles a little with him.

"Hey, Jess".

"Hey, doll. Listen, I want you to take good care of yourself and that baby, okay? Remember, you singing 'Don't Cry For Me, Argentina' in front of a sold-out crowd is an inevitability, and both Puckerman and that kid will be sitting front row for it".

Rachel giggles. "Yes, they are", she kisses the underside of Puck's jaw lovingly, her hand on her small stomach. "It's a boy, has Noah told you that?" At his surprised gasp, she smiles and nods. "Yeah, we're having a Pucklebaby boy. That's how Brittany and everyone else have taken to calling the baby".

"That's nice, babe." There's another pause, and Jesse asks quietly, "Rach... Are you happy?"

Rachel looks at Noah with a smile, the sound of her baby's steady heartbeat echoing in the silence of her room. "Yes, I am. I really am, Jess", she replies truthfully, and then adds, "You've picked a nice man, Jess. This baby will be proud to call you Uncle Jesse someday".

Puck chuckles gently and kisses her temple, coming close enough to hear Jesse's gentle laugh on the line. "That'll be my pleasure".


	14. 13

**Author's Note: **I'm sure not many of you know, but I'm engaged since May last year. In November 15th, a few weeks after my last update, I found out I was pregnant with our first child, who we later found out was a girl. At the time, we had been together for close to a year, and we had superficially discussed having children. The pregnancy was unexpected, but we both jumped headfirst into parenthood.

However, in January this year, I got sick with dengue fever. It's a common disease here in Brazil, with symptoms very similar to the flu: bodyache, headache, fever during the day, chills at night. To recover from it one just has to rest, keep themselves hydrated and let their body kick it off on its own. I'd had it once before, years ago, so I knew what to expect and how to fight it.

What I didn't know was that, to women in my condition, dengue fever had some serious consequences. Once I found out I was sick with it, my fiancé and my father checked me in a hospital; two days into my hospital stay, I suffered a miscarriage. I was a week away from my fourth month of pregnancy. This made _To Be a Father_ an extremely hard-to-write story. However, I will persevere and finish it. It'll take longer than planned, but do not give up on me.

**to be a father**

_thirteen_

**R**achel is discharged two days after she checked in the hospital. After the incident, everyone, from Noah to Nina, from Santana to Brittany, treats her like she's made of glass, this frail little thing that will break if not handled with extreme care and caution. Dr. Powell tells her she has to be more cautious from now on; her bleeding scare has just made everything a little more touch-and-go for her for the next weeks, however, that doesn't mean she has to stop living life normally. She just has to be extra careful and avoid any and every source of tension and emotional distress.

It's September now, and she's starting to show properly. Anne has hired someone to clean the backyard house for her – after it sparked a major fight between Puck and Rachel, since, two weeks after the incident with Finn, Puck came home from cleaning the Lopez's pool to find Rachel cleaning the main suite. He basically freaked out and ordered her to quit doing that. Rachel, who has a legendary temper but now that's dosed with a healthy shot of pregnancy hormones, didn't... quite **like** that. In the end, she stormed into their bedroom in the main house, calling Puck every well-mannered-girl curse she knew. Puck muttered a "fuck" after rushing in after her. It took Anne running interference to smooth everything down and have them kissing and making up.

Anyways, it's September now, and the next morning will be the first day Rachel will set foot in McKinley since the day she told the gleeks she was pregnant, nearly four months ago. She can't say she's not nervous. She had quit New Directions following Finn's nasty reaction to her announcement, and, even though Santana, Brittany, Quinn and Noah had tried to sway her decision, she was determined she wouldn't go back. After her hospital trip, Noah was on board with her staying far away from the choir room. Even Brittany fiercely said it would be better for her to stay as far from Finn as possible.

However, her being out of New Directions doesn't improve her reputation. In fact, she may be the one person in the entire student body that is in fact even more of a loser after quitting glee.

How pathetic does this make her?

Noah knows she's nervous. He can tell. He finds her sitting on the nearly empty nursery (they're still discussing themes for it. The only things they have there is his and Nina's old, white crib, and the old rocking chair his mother got from Nana Connie before he was born), rocking gently in the chair, its creaking noises the only sounds in the quiet room. She's looking out of the window into the darkening yard, wearing loose flannel pants and one of his old hoodies, a hand unconsciously rubbing her small belly, which pokes out from underneath the hoodie. "Hey, babe", he calls her softly so that he doesn't startle her too much. She blinks lazily and smiles weakly as her eyes focus on him. "You okay?"

She nods and makes a noncommittal noise, tucking a lock of her dark hair behind her ear. "Tomorrow school starts", she comments quietly. "And everyone will know I'm pregnant". She snorts. "I mean, the few people who have been away during and summer and are unaware of me being a mother-to-be".

He sighs and approaches her, pulls her up, sits on the chair and pulls her into his lap. She curls into him and he rubs her waist soothingly. "It'll be okay", he mumbles, pressing a kiss on her fleece-covered shoulder. "You know you'll have Schue trailing your steps begging you to come back, don't you?"

"I'm not going back", she answers firmly. "Not unless Finn quits, and since he's Mr. Schue's favorite student, I doubt he'll have Finn quit so he can have me back. Plus Kurt and Mercedes... The environment is just too toxic", she confesses softly, leaning her head against his shoulder. She feels him rest his cheek against her hair, nodding a little.

"I understand. But I think glee will break apart if you leave. You... You're the one who keeps us together, Rach. At least I think you are".

"No, I'm not", she argues, and he chuckles.

"You sure? Look, if you hadn't demanded a decent male lead from Schue, he wouldn't have slipped the Chronic Lady in Hudson's locker". He smirks at her soft gasp. "I saw him doing that after he heard the fucker singing in the shower. If Finn hadn't joined, Quinn wouldn't have joined, neither would have San and Brit. I would've never done it if it weren't for Quinn being knocked up with my kid, and Matt and Mike are too shy to have auditioned on their own accord. Face it, Berry. You're our glue".

She's at first silent, speechless, but then regains her wits. "That was then. Now, you don't need me for that. You all love glee. You won't quit".

"Says who?"

"I just did", she says with a smile. "Noah, you love performing. Glee is the one safe way to keep doing it regularly. You won't quit".

"I love you more than I do singing and dancing, babe", he replies. "And you, and our son, will need more than ever in the next few months. Schue and the other fuckers can kiss my ass. My family needs me more".

"Noah", she admonishes him softly, a smile on her face she can't quite suppress.

"So tomorrow we're gonna walk into that joint like we own the fucking place and all the other assholes can kiss our asses", he tells her with a grin, and she chuckles, looking a little more reassured and nodding. He kisses her temple, his hand splaying on her stomach. "We have to choose a name for him", he says, changing the subject to a more pleasant one.

Rachel bites her lower lip softly. Ever since she found out she's carrying a son, she has a name in mind. However, she doesn't think she can get him to agree to it, and she's terrified her suggestion will offend and/or hurt him. "We do", she nods hesitantly, still worrying her lower lip. "Do you have one in mind?"

"Not really", he admits, stroking her stomach. "I know I don't want him to be Aaron".

She's silent for a moment, then quietly says, "I don't have either".

Better keep her suggestion quiet for now. They still have months until they need to decide on that after all... And she's not that sure of her name choice anyway.

That can wait, and so she settles in the arms of her boyfriend and they watch as the sun sets.

* * *

**T**he next morning, Rachel wakes up as early as always. She takes a walk through her neighborhood, the only exercise Dr. Powell allowed her to get done in her state, and she goes back home to prepare for her day. She chooses a deep red, almost maroon, woolen sweater-dress, paired with black tights. It shows off her bump, but doesn't put it on display so that people can tell just by looking to her that she's pregnant.

(For safety reasons, she packs a change of clothes, deep green tights, a brown woolen wrap-dress. One can never be too prepared, especially when she's still fearful about slushie attacks).

Noah comes to pick her up and whistles as he sees her, kissing her tenderly. "You look so hot, babe", he tells her, and she giggles, curling next to him in the truck's cabin.

Whenever she imagined her entrance in McKinley as the pregnant girlfriend of Noah Puckerman, she always imagined everyone stopping dead at their tracks to watch them pass, the buzz of barely-muffled whispers trailing after them, Jacob shoving his detestable tape recorder on their faces to catch a statement he'd surely twist before publishing it on his despicable blog.

The reality of it cannot be more different.

People go with their day as they always do, the popular cliques gathering together, Cheerios staring enviously at her as she walks past them with Noah's arm firmly wrapped around her shoulders. Jacob's almost salivating at her when she catches sight of him, and she shudders in distaste. Noah tightens his hold on her, anxious, concerned eyes examining her face, and she shakes her head with a reassuring smile.

Suddenly two silhouettes walk up to them and she grins. Brittany and Santana, both wearing their wintery Cheerio uniforms (long-sleeved, red-and-white shirts, the usual red, twirly short skirt), slide up next to Rachel. The blonde smiles sunnily and hugs Rachel with a small squeal, the Latina smirking at her. "Looking hot, Berry", she praises, and Rachel giggles.

"Thank you, Santana. How are you today?"

"Tired already", Santana admits. "Coach Sylvester had us practice a whole new routine for Sectionals this morning, and Brit and I were thinking about ditching first period – it's Spanish", she says with a meaningful glance at Rachel and a dismissive flip of her hair, "to go grab something to eat. You guys in?"

"Please say yes, Rachel!" Brittany pleads with a puppy-like stare, and Rachel chuckles with a look at Noah. He shrugs and nods.

"I'm in", he replies, and Brittany claps her hands happily, taking one of Rachel's hand in hers and dragging her away. Santana and Noah watch the two girls walk away with fond smiles on their faces, following after them. He may seem relaxed, at ease, but he's not; in fact, he's tuned both to her mood and to any suspicious moves around them. Rachel, shrugging, follows Brittany willingly, locking arms with her.

"So... Miss Sylvester is already training you for Sectionals?" Rachel asks, and Brittany nods. Walking a little behind them, next to Puck, Santana snorts.

"The woman's a crazy, slave-driver bitch, but her methods are sure effective. We haven't lost a competition since... I don't even know when", the Latina says. Rachel sighs.

"Mr. Schuester could learn a thing or two with her, that's pretty much certain", she mumbles, looking down at the floor and scowling slightly.

"None of your concern anymore, babe", Puck says dismissively. "After all we've quit glee, right?"

Brittany gasps. "You can't quit glee!" The blonde cries, flabbergasted.

"I have to", Rachel replies sadly. "I mean... I can't keep going to glee, being lead. Not while I'm pregnant, and with Mercedes, and Kurt..." The brunette bites her lower lip. "... and Finn..."

"So Finn quits. No big deal. He's not a decent male lead anyways" Santana replies, easily.

But then Puck huffs, rolling his eyes. "Yeah. No big deal. As if Schue is gonna kick his star pupil out of glee like that", he snaps his fingers for emphasis, hands clenching into fists by his side. During Rachel's stay at the hospital, knowing Noah was still restless for how easily Finn got away from his attack at Rachel and the baby (one punch and a kick to the balls? Too little), Rachel had pleaded with Quinn to stay with him what little time he wasn't at the hospital with Rachel herself. So, there's still more than a healthy dose of residual anger in Puck, just begging to be released, preferably on the usually-confused face of Finn Hudson.

"Even if he would, New Directions would still be a member short without Finn. This means no competitions. That can't happen", Rachel argued.

"Without you we're also a member short, Berry", Santana shot back, rolling her eyes. "Plus, no one else can pull what you did last Sectionals. Look, I think I have the perfect solution for our little issue".

Rachel turns to look at the Latina, frowning, her eyes making the silent question. The brunette Cheerio smirks a little. "It seems McKinley Titans has a new coach. Her name is Shannon Beiste, and she's awesome-"

"You want to invite Coach Beiste to glee?" Puck snorts, and Santana glares at him.

"No, dumbass. _Callate _and let me speak. Anyways. Apparently, the Titans also have a new kid, candidate for the quarterback position. I saw him talk to Coach Beiste early this morning."

"He's cute", Brittany cuts in with a giggle. "All tall, blond. I think he plays for Kurt's team though", she adds with a sad frown. "That's bad, he has a pretty mouth, I'd like to kiss him".

Santana rolls her eyes fondly at her best friend and carries on, "Anyways. When we were leaving the gym after practice, we – Brit and I – walked past the auditorium. There was someone in there, singing. A guy. So, obviously, we sneaked in to see who it was".

Rachel's eyes are wide with understanding. "The new student sings?"

Santana nods. "Yes. He does. He was doing that Bruno Mars song, what's the name, Puckerman?" At his blank look, she huffs and sings quietly, "_I wanna be a billionaire, so fucking bad..._"

"_Billionaire_", Puck replies easily.

"Yeah, that. So... you know, I can think of a way, or two, to make him join glee after we kick Finnbecile out", Santana finishes with a small grin.

"That's counting on Schue actually agreeing to kick Finn's sorry ass out of New Directions", Puck points out, wrapping an arm around Rachel.

"You leave that with me", a female voice comes from behind them. The four teens turn around and come face to face with no other than Quinn, back in her red-and-white Cheerio glory, a scheming smile on her lips.


End file.
